The Sun Also Rises - Part 1 of 2 - Let's Hear It For the Boys

Episode Synopsis:  We’re throwing out a major sad face for this episode because Aunt Jenna is dead. Again. This time for reals. Actually, a lot of people died this episode including Jules, John, Greta and Elena. Guess which one miraculously came back from the dead? Hint: amazing hair. In a sub-plot, Caroline and Matt bust a cap in Tyler’s lupine behind, after which Caroline finds out that Matt’s been playing dumb about that whole compulsion to forget she’s a vampire. Seriously, you can’t trust ANYONE these days. Klaus, being all Klaus-y, nearly achieves the hybrid status until Bonnie reenacts some scenes from “The Craft” with help from Elijah. Yeah, it looks like everything is wrapped up nicely until Elijah double-crosses our heroes and takes off with Klaus. Not a great night for Mystic Falls.

Oh, Alaric. Sweet, full of good intentions, just trying to do his best, misfortune laden Alaric. Can I call you Al? I get that you’re all heroic because I’ve been watching for a while now but seriously, stop ripping off Damon’s style.

Slack will definitely be cut for Al this week though considering Jenna gone done and died. Wear your leather jacket with solemn pride, my friend. You deserve it.

This week’s episode was very intense so granted there weren’t a lot of wardrobe changes but, and stress that as a very sassy but, when it comes to the men of Vampire Diaries - when is variety stressed anyway? Elijah always look like that accountant who tried to screw you on your tax return. An immortal, bloodthirsty accountant. 

“What you don’t like my v-neck?” - no, Stefan, I like it just fine. Seriously. I’d like it even better if you were in daylight and it magically fell off. But what do I know, I’m just a writer.

When a man decides to sacrifice himself in an unholy ritual involving nearly every branch of the supernatural tree to save your life - that’s love. When you hear of his plan and protest like some whiny teenager and boldly claim that everything is going to be alright - that’s Elena Gilbert. But, when you stand brooding above a rock quarry in some really awesome dark denim - that’s all Stefan Salvatore. 

Apparently in Mystic Falls, the villains wear colour bucking a standard trend in storytelling. Also, visitors usually die or are subjected to a whole bunch of pain. Remind me to never visit this town; poor Klaus didn’t see it coming.

Speaking of Klaus: who would have thought that the first vampire in existence would be such a hot British dude? I can’t see the chain he’s wearing but rest assured, I won’t like it. Men wearing chains is akin to women wearing galaxy-print leggings. You just don’t do it.

 

With all of the excitement happening at the quarry, I wonder what Tyler’s been getting up to? You know, aside from transitioning into a werewolf and getting shot. Oh look at that, he’s a nakers under a blanket. Who needs fashion when you look like that? Me - but I’m a modest kind of guy.

“Caroline, look! Check out my muscles!”

“Yeah...so about this trying to kill me thingy...stop it.”

Why Caroline chose Matt, who’s looking like a GQ version of a Big Buck Magazine cover boy in this hunting jacket, over Tyler is beyond my comprehension. I guess I like dumb jocks over the outdoorsy type.

Now for those of you who have adopted wearing a leather jacket everywhere due to watching Vampire Diaries, I present to you “How to Wear A Leather Jacket In the Event of a Potential Threat to Civilization” featuring Damon Salvatore.

Lesson One: Own that jacket. Whether you’re cracking jokes or skulls.

Lesson Two: Crazy Eyes with a dash of Murderer Mouth adds to the clout your jacket carries.

Lesson Three: Don’t wear leather to a funeral, however, substitute it with a fitted suit and abandon the tie. Still badass, still sexy, always Damon.

*I was born to be a mediocre copywriter*

Here’s a tidbit of info that should not come as a surprise: I hate waffle prints. I don’t understand them and I don’t care to; don’t even get me started on ribbed cotton. Jeremy seems to have a penchant for the textured fabrics and if he wasn’t so darn cute, I’d hold it against him.

I definitely won’t win over any diehard Vampire Diaries fans but I’ll say this anyway: John Gilbert is a total fox. Well, in this episode anyway. The fitted shirt, biker style jacket and jeans that are tighter than any dad’s I’ve ever met are working for the vampire hunter. Too bad he’s dead. Like our love.

So what was my favourite bit of menswear this week? Jeremy’s funeral suit. The circumstances in which he had to bust it out are less than favourable because I loved me some Aunt Jenna but you can’t deny how good he looks.

The Dinner Party: Part 1 of 3 - Guest List

Episode Synopsis: It turns out you can kill an Original. But you may as well be civilized about it and invite him over for a dinner party first. Bonnie's tricks fall flat with the other witches in town, so they take her powers away. And Elena and Stefan, still hanging out at the lake house, fight over who gets to be more right. With a bonus appearance by the old timey Stefan (who is more sexy) and Damon (who was infinitely less sexy over a hundred years ago). As always, Sark, I mean, Uncle/Daddy John, is up to no good...we're just not sure what that no good is yet.

What do you wear when you take a seemingly unkillable and rather dapper vampire out on tour of your town? Why an adorable short trench coat, that's what.

Of course, this is Jenna we're talking about. She's possibly the only person in all of Mystic Falls who has no idea that anything weird is going on.  I'm not kidding. She doesn't seem to think it's odd that so many drifters come through town and then disappear. Or that her boyfriend's ring matches that of her niece's boyfriend and his brother. Or that her niece's best friend just got one of those rings as well. It isn't odd to her that if she doesn't say, "please, come inside", new friends just keep standing on the porch. Hell, she isn't really that suspicious about the coincidence that her brother-in-law had a kid with her boyfriend's wife and that kid is now her niece. Or that her brother-in-law had a ring to match everyone elses.

Jenna, it's a good thing you're cute, because I'm starting to think you're not the shiniest coin in the fountain.  Also helps that you have cute tote bags to go with your cute trench.

You've got an LL Bean/J Crew chic that I dig. And your boyfriend seems to be working the same look as well.

Jenna's inablity to spot odd goings-on really shines when it comes to her supposed friend Andie the Journalist.  Maybe you don't notice that every man in your life has the same ring, but you sure as hell notice when your friend starts wearing scarves. Every. Single. Day.

Oh sure, the scarves are cute. And while I don't expect her to jump to the conclusion that she's hiding vampire bites, she should question the new look. Or at least tease her friend about getting hickeys. (what? You're supposed to stop doing that when you're a grown up?).

  

Actually, the hickey theory would be a normal thing to guess at. I mean, look at your friend's boyfriend! He's constantly rocking the bad boy leather jacket (although, that's not really a stretch for the town of Mystic Falls) and he wears well-fitting tees like no other dude in town.

I mean, come on ladies. If your friend was dating that guy and she started wearing scarves, you'd think the same thing too. You'd be wrong, but you'd think it. 

Like I said, at least Jenna's cute.

Otherwise she might have figured out about the deadly vampire doppleganger trapped in a local cave.

Katherine must be so stoked that Damon brought her some new threads. She's been in the same cocktail dress for weeks.

Hopefully Damon didn't borrow from Andie's closet. The vest and teeny white top are the classiest affair going. Even with the coordinating scarf. (Seriously, if I were Jenna, I would have said "enough with the scarves already!")

Not that Jenna was dressing any better. Her purple top could have been cute, except the sheer bits gave her an unfortunate figure skater look. And while I love me some figure skating, I never want anyone to think that Nancy Kerrigan is my fashion hero. (I would accept Johnny Weir as a fashion hero. A bold choice, but I'd accept that).

As for the fellows at our dinner party, well, lots of shirts with one button undone and in various shades of grey and black. If Damon's shirt didn't fit him so well, I'd complain.

I will complain a little bit about Ric's jacket. What? No leather? This isn't the jacket you wear to a dinner party...even if you were reluctant to attend. Find a dinner jacket of some kind.

Just look at your pal, the unkillable and probably really evil vampire! He wore a jacket to dinner and it totally dressed up his shirt. He also wore some colour.  Fellas of Mystic Falls: I promise you, colour won't hurt you.

Or, you know, you can just keep on keeping on with your leather jackets.

I do admire Uncle Sark's John's gentlemanlyness. Even when he shows up to make trouble, he brings a bottle of vino.

I know we're a fashion blog, but I need to take a moment to address the interior design issues I'm having. What is up with chez Salvatore?

I get that they're vampires, but why so many candleabras and heavy fabrics?  They need someone to come lighten that place up a little and make it bit more bachelor pad like. Some lighter curtains. Maybe an Eames chair or two. It wouldn't hurt. /non-sequiter

Back to the fashion. Alaric, you're a fool to give up your giant magical cocktail ring. That sucker is huge.

 

Besides, Uncle Sark John is missing his ring finger. What the hell is he supposed to do with a ring? It's a wee bit insensitive of you to give him an accessory he can't wear.

The boldest fashion statement of the night might go to Katherine, who, after weeks in a cave, goes with her birthday suit and impeccable eye makeup.

Damon and his leather jacket may be in for some trouble.