The Sun Also Rises - Part 1 of 2 - Let's Hear It For the Boys

Episode Synopsis:  We’re throwing out a major sad face for this episode because Aunt Jenna is dead. Again. This time for reals. Actually, a lot of people died this episode including Jules, John, Greta and Elena. Guess which one miraculously came back from the dead? Hint: amazing hair. In a sub-plot, Caroline and Matt bust a cap in Tyler’s lupine behind, after which Caroline finds out that Matt’s been playing dumb about that whole compulsion to forget she’s a vampire. Seriously, you can’t trust ANYONE these days. Klaus, being all Klaus-y, nearly achieves the hybrid status until Bonnie reenacts some scenes from “The Craft” with help from Elijah. Yeah, it looks like everything is wrapped up nicely until Elijah double-crosses our heroes and takes off with Klaus. Not a great night for Mystic Falls.

Oh, Alaric. Sweet, full of good intentions, just trying to do his best, misfortune laden Alaric. Can I call you Al? I get that you’re all heroic because I’ve been watching for a while now but seriously, stop ripping off Damon’s style.

Slack will definitely be cut for Al this week though considering Jenna gone done and died. Wear your leather jacket with solemn pride, my friend. You deserve it.

This week’s episode was very intense so granted there weren’t a lot of wardrobe changes but, and stress that as a very sassy but, when it comes to the men of Vampire Diaries - when is variety stressed anyway? Elijah always look like that accountant who tried to screw you on your taxes. An immortal, bloodthirsty accountant.

“What you don’t like my v-neck?” - no, Stefan, I like it just fine. Seriously. I’d like it even better if you were in daylight and it magically fell off. But what do I know, I’m just a writer.

When a man decides to sacrifice himself in an unholy ritual involving nearly every branch of the supernatural tree to save your life - that’s love. When you hear of his plan and protest like some whiny teenager and boldly claim that everything is going to be alright - that’s Elena Gilbert. But, when you stand brooding above a rock quarry in some really awesome dark denim - that’s all Stefan Salvatore. 

Apparently in Mystic Falls, the villains wear colour bucking a standard trend in storytelling. Also, visitors usually die or are subjected to a whole bunch of pain. Remind me to never visit this town; poor Klaus didn’t see it coming.

Speaking of Klaus: who would have thought that the first vampire in existence would be such a hot British dude? I can’t see the chain he’s wearing but rest assured, I won’t like it. Men wearing chains is akin to women wearing galaxy-print leggings. You just don’t do it.

 

With all of the excitement happening at the quarry, I wonder what Tyler’s been getting up to? You know, aside from transitioning into a werewolf and getting shot. Oh look at that, he’s a nakers under a blanket. Who needs fashion when you look like that? Me - but I’m a modest kind of guy.

“Caroline, look! Check out my muscles!”

“Yeah...so about this trying to kill me thingy...stop it.”

Why Caroline chose Matt, who’s looking like a GQ version of a Big Buck Magazine cover boy in this hunting jacket, over Tyler is beyond my comprehension. I guess I like dumb jocks over the outdoorsy type.

Now for those of you who have adopted wearing a leather jacket everywhere due to watching Vampire Diaries, I present to you “How to Wear A Leather Jacket In the Event of a Potential Threat to Civilization” featuring Damon Salvatore.

Lesson One: Own that jacket. Whether you’re cracking jokes or skulls.

Lesson Two: Crazy Eyes with a dash of Murderer Mouth adds to the clout your jacket carries.

Lesson Three: Don’t wear leather to a funeral, however, substitute it with a fitted suit and abandon the tie. Still badass, still sexy, always Damon.

*I was born to be a mediocre copywriter*

Here’s a tidbit of info that should not come as a surprise: I hate waffle prints. I don’t understand them and I don’t care to; don’t even get me started on ribbed cotton. Jeremy seems to have a penchant for the textured fabrics and if he wasn’t so darn cute, I’d hold it against him.

I definitely won’t win over any diehard Vampire Diaries fans but I’ll say this anyway: John Gilbert is a total fox. Well, in this episode anyway. The fitted shirt, biker style jacket and jeans that are tighter than any dad’s I’ve ever met are working for the vampire hunter. Too bad he’s dead. Like our love.

So what was my favourite bit of menswear this week? Jeremy’s funeral suit. The circumstances in which he had to bust it out are less than favourable because I loved me some Aunt Jenna but you can’t deny how good he looks.

The Last Day, Part 2 of 2 - The Guys

For the most part, the gentlemen (if some of them can even be called that) of TVD are pretty standard: dark and broody. Stefan's the one who wears the most semblance of color, really. 

An olive shirt, how intriguing!

I do like this blue combo he has during his and Elena's nature walk. It's reassuring somehow. It also makes his hair look lighter. Mmm. His hair.

Good ol' Damon, though, stays in black for the whole episode. Classic jacket.

When Klaus shows up at the bar to politely threaten Damon and Alaric, he has a glimpse of red under a dark jacket, but for the most part, looks pretty ominous. Although his short haircut is nice, no?

Caroline's boyfriend, Matt, shows up to Damon's rescue wearing his uniform blue t-shirt from the Grill and...black corduroy maybe? I don't know what to make of him, honestly. He is confused about life, and confusion sometimes leads to betrayal. If he loves Caro, he needs to get his act together. All I'm saying is why date that...

...when you could date THIS!? Tyler has some color, he's rocking the neutrals and his jacket isn't corduroy. It's leather. A chic beige, no less. And his hair? Boom. Okay? BOOM. Tyler is fierce. And he's loyal. He came back to make sure his mom was ok even though the other wolves told him not to. ...I'm just saying.

Crying Wolf: Part 2 of 2 - The Gents

The boys? Not impressive. To be honest, it wasn't a very shocking episode overall as far as wardrobe goes. But fair's fair.

Okay, so at the town tea party, Elijah is scoping everybody out with a regular suit on and the same mid-to-late-1990's haircut he showed up in. (I disagree with Alaric's later statement about "great hair.")

Speaking of Alaric, he continues to dress like a would-be mountain man, scruff included, but I just had to include this picture of how disastrously upset he looks to be sipping tea out of the Royal Dalton 'Old Country Roses' Fine China Collection at a society event. (Look, my mom has that tea set. It's gorgeous. But Alaric's face is priceless.)

Luka, when cornered by Bonnie at the Grill, looks about as fashionable as any of the other dudes on the show, with what looks like it SHOULD be a leather jacket, but is actually just a canvas jacket of some kind and a graphic tee underneath. Again, not much color.

Meanwhile, back at the ranch... I mean lake house... Elena and Stefan play dress up in Mom and Dad's closet, and Stefan dons a vintage flannel coat from Elena's grampa. It's red and plaid. But he does look pretty great.

At least the jacket has some texture, some life to it. Better than his bland red zip-up hoodie from earlier. Blah.

Blah. Maybe he was getting into the deep reds to show his lurve for Elena, who also enjoys dark rouge and crimson?

I don't have much to say about the wolf pack, but this needs to be said. This wolf guy (whose name escapes me!) gives everybody attitude the whole episode, and then later jumps on Damon from the ceiling and stabs him in the neck with a syringe... but he spends the entire show wearing a gray brimmed beanie cap. What? Did he have a skater boy phase before going lycan? So random.

Aaaaaand here he is, the man of the hour: Tyler. The whole episode is centered on him making choices between his new wolfy family and his childhood friends. Moral decisions! Life altering questions! All choices made while wearing a leather jacket. Hooray! But he looks fabulous, no? And the white shirt underneath gives him a kind of good-versus-evil-internal-struggle look. Also, he's matching Elena, who ends up being the friend he chooses to help save. Aww.

Daddy Issues, Part 1 of 2 - The Bad Boys

Episode Synopsis: Drama, drama, drama. Elena and Jeremy’s daddy is back, but it’s not a happy family reunion. As Elena states “You may be my father, but I’ll never be your daughter.” Ouch. Elena – 1, Daddy – 0. The two vampire brothers argue about which way to deal with werewolves – the nice way, or… the nice way, in Damon’s point of view. It’s not all fun and games when things get messy between the enemies and Caroline is kidnapped. Werewolves play rough, and Damon’s witty responses don’t always cover every situation.

Why does everyone’s fixed gaze in Vampire Diaries make my heart melt? Tyler’s done it again. A leather jacket? I couldn’t tell. It would seem so typical of him to wear one, seeing as EVERY male character (and sometimes female!) is shown in a leather jacket during every episode.

Well helllooooo Damon. This is one of your best looks so far. Why don’t you wear a towel to school?

Uncle John (or Daddy John?) pulls off the sports jacket with his steaming cup of coffee. I like how the collar is up on the sides, but down in the front.

Damon and Stefan are out and ready to become a boy’s band! With their matching black v-necks and jeans, they decided to dress the same today. Stefan’s hoodie is a nice color, and at least it stops him from performing a Backstreet Boy’s music video in the middle of his living room.

Brady and Jules called each other this morning in order to coordinate outfits. Two casual tops, two leather jackets. Sticking with the Vampire Diaries style.

Jeremy seems to have everything right when it comes to clothing. He knows how to work his casual, effortless style by throwing on a hoodie and a great jacket and calling it a day. If only he bought a comb ...

WOO it’s time for a celebration! Matt is wearing a JEAN JACKET. No leather here! First time in this episode that a scene has passed with no leather in it.

Damon taking a bubble bath. And I thought the hottest he could get was in his towel.

The Descent, Part 2 of 2 - The Boys

As for the boys ... let's just say that they didn't exactly pull their weight in this episode. I know Damon's distraught over Rose's impending death, but he's looking a little uninspired tonight. He couldn't even give himself some period clothes for Rose's dream?

And he deprived us of a leather jacket, opting instead for this cotton number. For shame, Damon. For shame. Sure, attacking a poor but stylish woman was bad, but what's worse is that you didn't even bother to dress up for your return to evil. How are we supposed to take your transformation seriously if you're not wearing a leather jacket? At the very least, you could have donned a cape. Something other than this perfectly nice but terribly boring jacket.

The other Salvatore brother is barely in the episode, but he spends half his screentime shirtless, so at least there's that.

Oh, I see now why he was shirtless for the first scene - it was to make up for the fact that he's wearing a plaid button down and rocking hair last seen on Robert Patterson. Is it Mandatory Vampire Love Interest Hair? Because if I saw a vampire with hair like that, I would have a hard time taking him seriously as a threat - there's no way he can pose any real danger when he spends that much time getting his hair perfectly teased and mussed.

Poor Caroline. First she's turned into a vampire, then she's stuck in a love triangle with two guys who share the same outfit.

If not for the fact that Matt and Tyler were in a scene together, I would think that the football team has a communal pair of pants and belt that only one team member can wear at a time. Maybe the jeans and belt are part of the uniform, along with the jersey?

Caroline is right - everybody does need to stop kissing her. They need to pull a Kelly Taylor and Choose Themselves, if for no other reason than Tyler and Matt really need to start thinking about their wardrobe limitations. Tyler, you're a werewolf now. You get to wear ripped jeans and be the sensitive but strong love interest. Matt, you're ... well, you exist. Go get a piercing or something, I don't care. Just do something, because at this point, I'm hoping Caroline chooses Uncle John.