Pretty Little Liars: Stolen Kisses

Part 1 of 2: Truly Outrageous

STUFF WE LEARNED THIS WEEK: Maya has a disorganized password-protected video blog that may or may not offer some evidence; Ezra's mother totes hates Aria for ruining Ezra's life; Ezra is incredibly rich (so then why is he hiding $$$ in his sock drawer??); and Emily learns that she totally hooked up with Paige during her Lost Night. ALSO: Hanna testified to keep Mona in Rosewood, Spencer learns even she can't hack into every website in the world, and Nate is clearly up to no good. I mean, we don't know that for a fact, but dude is shady as hell, even for this show.

Fans of 80s cartoons may recognize my sub-title for this recap, Truly Outrageous!, as a shout-out to the classic TV series Jem and the Holograms. The PLLs know what I'm talking about because Aria and Hanna were full-on Erica Benton/Jem this week.

This body-con mini w/ peplum? I die. If this was baby blue, it would be basically identical to one of the outfits my Jerrica/Jem doll had in the 80s. Although, Jerrica didn't accessorize with a studded double belt... or a cray cray fringed Boho bag:

See, you'd think that a gigantic denim (?) fringed bag wouldn't be the best choice for a girl who's 4' tall and wearing a dress possibly borrowed from a 1980s cartoon character. 

Yet somehow... I kind of dig this. Aria's what, 16? 17? If you can't mix this bag with this dress when you're 16, when can you do that? WARNING: THIS LOOK IS NOT ADVISED FOR AMATEURS.

Hanna, meanwhile, is working the Glamorous Fashion And Fame side of Jerrica/Jem in.. well... this:

Let's break it down. Sleeveless fuschia denim (?) button-down. A very on-trend Silence & Noise bustier. Leftover necklace chains as earrings.

Belt buckle the size of her face. Black micro-mini.

I enjoy her use of a sock bun here. Somebody's been reading Pinterest tutorials! (Though personally, I'd prefer if she had pinned up the stray hairs in the back, as she's got a kind of bun/mullet going on).

Bear in mind: Hanna and Aria are dressed this way for a casual hang with their friends on Sunday afternoon. Not school (where the dress code is ALWAYS cocktail casual, apparently), not a date, not a job interview... just hanging out with their BFFs. You might think they'd wear sweats or jeans... but these two know they need to dress to impress.

Spencer didn't get the memo.

Is that tank made of... macrame fishnet? Like, not fishnet stockings, but an actual FISH NET? I wouldn't be surprised to see she's only wearing 3" heels, rather than the PLL standard 5". Step it up, Hastings.

Since Spencer's taking the Emily role of most boringly-dressed, Emily SHOCKINGLY knocks it out of the park this week. Seriously, I don't think I've taken this many screencaps of an Emily outfit in EVER. Yes, she's wearing a tank and cutoffs, but the hat makes it suddenly 10,000% more stylish.

Is this all it takes to turn an Emily outfit from blah to OMFG!? A hat? NOTE TO EMILY: WEAR MORE HATS.

SO EFFING CUTE I CAN'T EVEN. Who are you, and what have you done with Emily Fields??

Joining Emily in this adorbs American Eagle ad come to life is Nate, mixing things up with plaid cargo shorts and an embellished tank and hoodie:

Boyfriend's shady as HELL, but is showing more steeze than Toby Cavanaugh has in three seasons.

 

Speaking of, Toby's style may be meh, but he's pulling on his big boy pants as he challenges Spencer to let him know what's going on. Obviously she doesn't, and when he vowed to find out for himself, I began to worry he may be going the way of Maya (i.e. TOTALLY MURDERED BY A)

Also: does his shirt have a tumor?

In the menswear department, the secretly incredibly wealthy Ezra Fitzgerald brings a simple black tee:

And Dr. Wren brings a cute plaid tie and tan shirt combo:

And Caleb brings the GORGEOUSNESS:

Welcome back, handsome. We've missed you. 

Comments

[Hanna]

Just wanted to say that I love these posts. I feel like you don't get as much credit as you should. DO NEVER EVER STOP DOING THESE. Then I would die. Awesome job, and i totes agree with your opinions. Girl you're amaaaazing.