Part 1 of 2: Creepiest DIY Ever
You guys, all these years we’ve been watching A play with dolls, but I never expected A would LITERALLY turn the Liars into dolls. But that’s what happened when the kidnapped Liars woke up in the bunker from hell (take that, Kimmy Schmidt!) that looked like their bedrooms. So with only Spencer and Totally Not Dead Mona’s brains to help them figure the place out and escape, the girls plan the prom from hell and almost escape — except A has an electric fence. Outside of the bunker, Caleb and Mrs. Hastings are the only competent humans around, while the cops, Toby, and Ezra are 100% useless. Goes to show that maybe telling Mrs. Hastings about A earlier would have helped. And that Caleb works really well with any brain belonging to a Hastings. And after all of this, all we know is that A is named Charles and he really likes proms and the DiLaurentis family. So basically, we know nothing.
For a second, I bet Spencer and the others had a moment of relief. Like "thank god I wasn’t falsely accused of a crime I didn’t commit (this time) and sent to prison and kidnapped along the way."
Alas. It wasn’t just a bad dream. It was the beginning of a living nightmare orchestrated by A. With a friendly note to welcome you to the dollhouse.
And a camera to watch your every move.
And family photos of the Old Navy mannequins, in case you weren’t already creeped out by the level of detail this psycho went to to create your bedroom in an abandoned underground bunker.
And to create your former BFF’s living room.
Creepier still is that the unseen A has broken Mona down enough to dress her up like Ali.
But hey! Mona is totally not dead! She’s just dressed like a dead girl and hosting tea parties. Frilly tops must be one of Mona’s worst nightmares.
As you do in Rosewood. I bet she wishes Ali had worn something with a little more style on the night she was buried alive. That and her imprisonment in the dollhouse bunker.
In between sips of tea, Emily is seriously questioning this color on Mona.
Fair. I’m not sure blonde is her thing.
So what does a girl do when she’s trapped in a bunker? Play Mystery Date, of course!
Would anyone else in Rosewood find it weird if Ezra, former Rosewood High English teacher made an appearance at their actual senior prom? I wish they would, but I assume they’d all act like this is totes normal. Including his former colleagues. This town is messed up.
And if you don’t like the games? Too bad! A has a siren!
Of course, they didn’t get kicked out of the playroom before Spencer’s brain catalogued this seemingly insensitive gem:
Just a pile of blocks? Not at all! It’s an artist’s signature
Seriously, I mean it when I say that a top secret government agency needs to recruit Spencer Hastings, teen detective. They may also want to grab Mona while they’re at it.
She’s not only rolling with the A game, but she’s figured out how to best use the three minutes of generator downtime each night. She’s like a teenage Sydney Bristow.
Once A was done locking the girls in their fake rooms, there was a new plan: re-create the prom from Melissa Hastings’ high school days.
Why? Damned if anyone knows. But the prom is on and the girls, still in the same outfits, have to put it together.
Thankfully, Spencer and Mona figure out that some copper wire, Christmas lights and a camera are all they need to escape the prom from hell. These two also have a future as MacGyver. Because they actually put this scene together.
Both practical and pretty. Too bad the only ones to appreciate are a room full of mannequins.
Although, on the upside, that means fewer witnesses to the prom dresses of days gone by.
In addition to be a creepy fixation on a prom that was well before their time, I feel like this is a bit of a judgement on the proms of 2006 (or whenever the girls were in middle school. Who knows what year it is in Rosewood anymore. They’ve been in their senior year for three years now.) Look, prom style does not age well. Trust. This was once a very good look:
Unfortunately, not so much anymore. Which is why Hanna is dressed like a figure skater performing to Carmen, Emily is in crushed velvet with a giant bejewelled middle, Spencer looks like she's at the Outlander prom, and Aria is a reject from a 90s vampire movie. This is not the Liars' finest hour.
So, the MacGyver plan does work – but it only gets them to more rooms of the bunker.
Is that a psycho behind me? The same psycho who is making me wear a choker and dressed like I belong in a Scottish clan? Why yes, yes it is.
A seems to be fixated on the DiLaurentis family, which other than the name Charles, is the only clue we get this week.
Pink satin and blonde hair are not Mona’s friend. And that much bedazzling is not anyone's friend. Ever.
But honestly, I need some answers on this. Even more than when I wanted to know who was in the barrel. (Who was in the barrel by the way? Clearly not Mona).Why the old prom? Why the DiLaurentis family? And why these girls? Do I really have to wait until the end of season 10 to learn the answers to this? Because let’s face it, there will be no answers at the beginning of season 6.