Reversals of Fortune, 1 of 3 - Serena and Blair

Episode Synopsis: Chuck and Blair play games, Serena is in the tabloids but TOTALLY has a reason for doing it, no really!, Dan settles into the good life, Vanessa is whiny, Scott is stalker-y.

There are times when I'm amazed at how closely Gossip Girl mirrors my own life.  Why, just the other day I forgot my pants and paparazzi were following me, too!  Serena, I totally feel your pain!  Call me!

I'll say one thing for Serena, though...she sure is practical.  For instance, here is a space-saving tip: If you plan to go on a picnic, don't pack a separate blanket - just use your dress upon arrival at your destination.  Of course, you do run the risk of enacting Manet's Le Déjeuner sur l'Herbe...

Long (but tiny) shot.  Flowy dresses are ok.  I think what's so heinous about this one is that the bodice offers no shape definition.

See?  Flowy, but with shape definition.  The color is flattering, but it does remind me of something that Remi from season 4 of Project Runway would create.  I suppose that's fine, but I'll admit that when she came on the screen, Tim Gunn's voice popped into my head: "This concerns me...."

Woo-hoo!  Blair saves the day!  This summer dress is adorable, and has a bit of a 1950s housewife vibe...perfect for "playing" the scorned woman.  If someone were yelling at me while they were wearing this dress, I’d probably just nod and smile because all the while I’d be thinking “gosh, that’s cute.  Maybe when she’s done screaming at me she’ll let me borrow it?”

This is pretty, but I don't buy it as a day dress, especially when it's warm enough for Serena to justify wearing a tablecloth.  Blair's dress looks hot and itchy.  No wonder she wants sexy time with Chuck...it’s an excuse to take her dress off.  Love the clutch. 

Don’t love the shoes.  They drag the eye down, and make everything look heavy.

On the other hand, her dress for the polo match is a winner.  So pretty and light, with the perfect hat and a Tiffany fleur-de-lis key pendant.

Closeup of her cloche.  This is utterly charming and adorable, and I love that it's a peony, one of Blair's favorite flowers.  Good job, Blair.  Way to save the show!

Reversals of Fortune, 2 of 3 - the other girls

Jenny does poolside glam.  Ah, to be 15 (16? whatever.) and leggy!

Back in the city, Jenny wears shorts that say “look at my tummy pooch” on anyone except Taylor Momsen.  It works...on her.

But the hair...please tell me we're not in for a whole season of this nonsense.

::sigh:: Apparently we are.  I'm pretty sure Lily's penthouse comes with shampoo and a comb.  Look around.  Ask a staff member for help if necessary.

Moving on, her little playsuit is cute.  Has a bit of a mid-century feel to it.

Long shot.  Love everything except the hair.

::facepalm::  Jenny, keep wearing stuff like this to polo matches and this will be the last engraved invitation you receive!  The outfit isn't bad, but it's inappropriate, IMO.  At the very least, she could've toned down the Courtney Love action going on above the neck.

Again.  The hair.  What gives?  Maybe Vanessa is at the coffeehouse doing a Bob Marley tribute.  I can almost hear her singing “Three Little Birds”...  (Shout out to Chicago-based Intellegentsia coffee.  I have a mug just like this, although I'll bet hers doesn't have the Chicago flag on the reverse side)

On to the outfit.  I like the concept, but the shorts end up making her look like some sort of hipster superhero, off to save those who have become too mainstream.  Let’s imagine what might be in her yellow bag emergency kit, shall we?: I’m guessing some fair trade coffee, a MetroCard, one Jack Kerouac novel, some pierogi, and a TV on the Radio LP.  I know none of those things are terribly avant-garde, but Super Hipster is all about baby steps.

I will say this...Super Hipster has some great legs.

Yes, I do believe this is what Vanessa would wear to a UES-in-the-country polo match.  It's ok.  I'm not even gonna address the hair (oops, just did!)

This is one of those dresses I will just have to admire from afar.  The color is lovely on Ashely, but  I can’t wear it.  It also has great movement, despite the baggy top.  Honestly, I'm surprised I like it as much as I do.

Aren’t planes freezing?  I usually bundle up when I’m flying, no matter what the season.  Why, just a few weeks ago I was at O’Hare and spotted someone wearing a similar amount of clothing to Bree here, and thought to myself “you’re going to be co-old” in that self-rightous sing-songy voice.  Bree probably made out with Nate just to keep warm.

Very pretty dress...it's a good shape, it's not inappropriately casual, the neckline is flattering, and the print is cute.  Nice pink clutch, too.

I am now convinced that the only hairbrush on the GG set was in Leighton Meester's trailer.  It looks like Joanna Garcia (Bree) had the good sense to break in and use it.   Alexandra Richards, on the other hand, did not.  As for Alexandra's dress...no, do not like.  The color is blah, and top is reminiscent of the leaf from the Fruit of the Loom guys.

Reversals of Fortune, 3 of 3 - the guys

Chuck, in prepping for his role with Bass Industries, has been watching a little too much Wall Street.  I can just see him sitting in front of a green computer monitor while on an antiquated brick cell phone, telling someone that “Greed is Good”

A 6-button double breasted Brooks Brothers suit is enough of a fashion statement without the bandana-print pocket square and Tiffany lapel pin.  I'd even grant you one of those accessories, Chuck.  But both?  That's what we call overkill.

Long shot.  See?  Less arresting when you can't make out the pocket square.

Fabulous colors and textures at the polo match.

Wider view.  This is so flattering and fashion forward, without being costume-y.

Chuck, a question for you.  Is there another character in the Gossip Girl universe who can rock silk pajamas the way you can?

Peasant, why do you ask me such things?  No.  Obviously, there is not.  Cease your tiring babble and fetch me a Johnny Blue on the rocks.

Ooh, very nice, Nate!  This shirt is casual, but the double pockets and slim cut make it stylish.

Long shot.  He pairs the shirt with moccasins and rumpled jeans.  Looks great.

Does anyone else think that Nate will someday turn Evil?  I can see a little hint of it here.  I’d take EvilNate over BoringNate or BroodingNate.  Nice contrasting trim on the shirt.

No, Dan.  Absolutely not.  These glasses are not ok.  They are not ironic, nor hipster, nor trendy.  They belong to a member of the Pink Ladies.  Do not wear them EVER AGAIN!

A snug v-neck t-shirt that shows off your new muscles, on the other hand, is ok.

As is this casual suit at the polo match.  It's a good blend of Brooklyn-Dan-meets-UES-money.

Oh Eric, do you ever wear anything bad?  I love this shirt with the stripes and the pocket...

Even this is saved from boredom with the contrasting cuffs.

Eh, ok...this is nothing revolutionary, but it's appropriate and stylish and that makes is fine in my book.

Carter...honey?  Did we forget to finish getting dressed?

Utter perfection.  Grandfather van der Bilt looks distinguished and stylish while still age appropriate.  The contrasting collar, the mix of patterns...he is completely believable as a multi-billionaire tycoon bent on controlling his family members' lives.

Rufus, I see you lost some jewelry from last season.  Good for you!