Summer, Kind of Wonderful - Part 1 of 3 - Kind of Lovers

Episode Synopsis:  It’s summer in the Hamptons — Serena’s been pouting, Chuck’s been whoring, Nate’s been secretly screwing a married woman, and Blair's been hiding in France, trying to pretend Chuck isn’t a total asshole.  So basically, par for the course for the Non-Judging Breakfast Club.  Dan, however, has turned over a new leaf and is taking a page out of Chuck’s book, all in an attempt to forget that he was once Lonely Boy.  And instead of gossiping and training as a loyal Constance minion, little Jenny is working herself to the bone at Eleanor Waldorf’s atelier as a summer intern.

Nate, at the end of the summer in the Hamptons, has finally fulfilled the great potential he had during the school year—he’s turned into a massive manwhore who’s attracted the attention of Catherine, an older, married ex-model.

But has he really changed all that much?

His wardrobe tells us that no, he's still wild about the color blue.

Accessorizing his pecs with it.

And his big guns.

To his credit, this outfit of Nate’s actually has a few interesting details that improve it from his usual t-shirt uniform seen above—from the white detailing to the tie yoke.  Even the plain khaki cargo shorts fit him perfectly.

For the White Party, he is, of course, required to wear something not blue.

 

The cream colored sweater layered over the white t-shirt is honestly an uninspiring choice but then it’s Nate Archibald.  He probably doesn’t even know that pairing cream and white together is a big fat no-no.

Unlike Nate’s uneven outing, his fake girlfriend Serena puts together an excellent sartorial episode—distinguishing herself without reverting to her default trampiness.

Love this gray silky swimsuit coverup accessorized by just a splattering of silver sequins along the v-neck.

Even the coral beaded cuff adds just the right amount of color to her otherwise monochromatic outfit.

We don’t get to see much of this muted gold coverup Serena wears while chatting with Blair by the pool, but the color gives her a glow that has nothing to do with her tan.

J’adore the periwinkle and cream shift dress Serena dons for her “date” with the lifeguard—or is it the Kleenex?  Hard to remember.

Regardless, she looks stunning, with her wavy hair, and the color bringing out the tan she’s spent the summer perfecting.

For shopping with Blair, Serena changes into a short (very short) green and white tank dress with yellow accents.  Honestly, I look at this and think she just walked off a tennis court.

I do love the pop of color she adds with the blue quilted Chanel bag.

For the White Party, Serena hits it out of the park.

This white Grecian gown is deceptively simple but fits her flawlessly, and her hair, with the braided twists and curls, intertwined with the silver chain, is stunning.

By wearing such a simple garment, Serena’s hairstyle can be intricate and accessorized without looking overdone.

This episode Serena plays at being Nate’s girlfriend in order to shield his real ladylove—an older married cougar named Catherine. Most of her scenes require no clothes at all—but since this is Nate we’re talking about, I guess that shouldn’t come as a big surprise.

To the White Party, Catherine dons a tank maxi-dress that makes her look incredibly flat and unattractive.  Not sure if this was a preconceived plan to prevent Nate from ripping her clothes off at the party, but it could have been.

She’s jealous of Serena at the party, and really, after seeing S’s dress, and then Catherine’s, it’s not hard to see why.

Serena would never let her two best friends look this sad, tired or paunchy.

As for Dan, he’s gone the opposite direction of Serena.  Instead of closeting himself away, feeling sorry for himself, he’s become the exact opposite, turning into a serious manwhore a la Nate or Chuck.

Dan should always be a manwhore.  He looks a million times better in this classy beige button-up and gray slacks.  Maybe some of Serena rubbed off on him after all.

But Dan doesn’t stay dapper for long.  In fact, he returns to the comforting environs of plaid sooner rather than later.

But when he finally gets his head screwed on straight and heads to the White Party to tell Serena how much he’s missed her (apparently he’s had time to miss her in-between flirting with everything in a skirt), Grandma CeCe gets her hooks into him and fixes the situation.

I get that Dan wouldn’t be Dan if he dressed like this all the time, but I still think he should.  He looks charming and chic and finally deserving of the Grecian goddess that’s Serena Van der Woodsen.

Grandma CeCe, who gives Dan his much-needed makeover for the White Party, looks unsurprisingly lovely this episode. 

This floral scarf and pearl pairing is charming and very summery.

Her cream suit for the party is deceptively simple, but makes the most of her gorgeous skin and glossy white hair, arranged in this stunning chignon.

When I’m her age, I can only hope I’ll be this well-preserved and youthful.  Either that, or I’m rich enough to afford the same ridiculously expensive plastic surgeon I’m sure CeCe uses.

Or maybe it's all the gin. Are juniper berries good for the skin? I'm off to Google...

Summer, Kind of Wonderful - Part 2 of 3 - Kind of Enemies

I could have told Chuck there was no way Blair Waldorf would ever show up to the Hamptons alone after he abandoned her in Tuscany, but he clearly wouldn’t have listened because he seems completely floored when she arrives with Marcus, her new boytoy in tow.

When she arrives, via the Jitney, she looks charmingly dishelved, but still very smart in her blue patterned blouse, blue shorts and coordinating hunter green bag.

She’s definitely been traveling, but since she’s Blair, she's still gorgeous.

Jet lag?  What jet lag?

For early morning smoothies by the pool with Serena, Blair looks rested and tan, lounging in her retro yellow flowered swimsuit, torturing Chuck with tales of Marcus.

It’s a very conservative suit—nothing like one Serena might have picked—but incredibly flattering on her.

For the family dinner she uses to introduce Marcus to Chuck, Blair changes into a green leaf patterned shift dress.

By itself, this dress is nothing special, but the green does suit her tan and her sun-streaked dark hair very well.  What makes it special is the scene that’s set later—but let’s not get ahead of ourselves.

What I do love most about this outfit is the outrageous green flowered headband she wears with so much aplomb.

Nobody but Blair could maintain their composure wearing a green flower on their head while confronting their douche of an ex-boyfriend.

The next day, Blair gets to confront Chuck yet again, and of course, she still looks fabulous.

This is the ultimate summer chic outfit.  The flowered shirtdress, complete with wide pink belt, is lovely on her, and I love the way she accessorizes with the straw bag edged in pink and the blue scarf tied around her curls.  She looks amazing and by God, she knows it.

This is also the outfit in which she uttered those famous words: "Damn that Motherchucker!"

For the White Party, Blair pulls out all the stops, determined to make both Marcus and Chuck salivate after her amazingness.

In this white bandage dress complete with matching white headwrap, she’s stunning.

In fact, I think this might be the best she’s ever looked on Gossip Girl.

Really capping off the look is the white rosette headwrap.

Yes, the whole outfit (minus headwrap) might be something that Serena might wear, but in the end, Blair accomplishes her goal, which is to make both Marcus and Chuck putty in her tiny manicured hands.

And who is this Marcus character that Blair picks up to make Chuck miserably jealous and envious?

Oh, he’s nothing special.  He’s just a Lord.  From, you know, England.

A huge surprise it is too.  I don’t even think Anne Archibald would have forced Nate into this super WASPy sweater.

Additionally, Blair should have ripped this ridiculous powder blue blazer off him and thrown it into the Atlantic.

Adding to the blazer’s ugliness is its pairing with a yellow polo.  He looks like a stray Easter egg.

Even at the White Party, he can’t get things quite right.  He dresses very formally in a full white suit, with beige colored tie. 

I think the fussy detail that kills the entire outfit is the strange way the collar of his shirt rests over the tie.  Not a good look overall.

Chuck, on the other hand, has only upped his sartorial awesomeness over the summer.  His personality can use some readjustment, but his outer layers are great just as they are.

Even when he’s dressed casually for the beach, Chuck still brings the suave attitude.

His straw fedora is awesome and so is Chuck Bass.

When he changes to go beg forgiveness from Blair, he chooses into an even better outfit, as if the combination of checked plaid shirt and orange blazer will ensure his success.

And if the clothes don’t work, then maybe the flowers will.

What he doesn’t know is that Blair’s planned for him never to be successful by bringing Marcus along, sending Chuck into a glowering rage.

She also sends him into an ill-advised pair of short, tight navy shorts and a busy patterned red and white polo shirt.  Not one of his best looks of the episode, but then we really should forgive because of the hole he’s dug with Blair.

But this is Chuck we’re talking about, and he doesn’t stay down for long.  For the dinner with the family and Blair, he wears a gorgeous mint green suit with blue bowtie and pocket square, paired with a light pink shirt.  On anyone else (ahem, Marcus), he would look like an Easter egg, but instead he looks masculine and powerful.

On top of that, the green suit sets up one of the most iconic visuals of all time.

It’s an incredible shot, with both Blair and Chuck in green, underneath the bowed tree branches.

For the ride back to New York, Chuck goes a lot more casual, which is appropriate for a high school kid in the summer.  Still, the gray checked shirt, paired with brown plaid shorts and accessorized with the straw fedora has a lot of style.

But instead of taking his limo back to New York, Chuck decides to stay in the Hamptons and uncover the inconsistencies with Blair’s boytoy’s story.

What better kind of outfit to wear while scheming than a cream and red argyle sweater worn with khaki shorts and checked knee high socks.

But it’s not until the White Party that Chuck pulls out all his fashion stops, donning a tailored white suit with black trim.  He’s even wearing a matching black ascot.

It’s too bad that even this glorious white suit can’t win back Blair’s heart, but then it isn’t his clothes that she wants, but those three words, eight letters that he can’t say.

Summer, Kind of Wonderful - Part 3 of 3 - Kind of Workaholics

Jenny’s spent all summer working her tiny fingers to the bone at Eleanor’s atelier—not for Eleanor, but for Eleanor’s assistant, Laurel.

Still, it’s served her well, working that hard, because her wardrobe has improved exponentially by being around high fashion all the time.

Love this light pink ruffled tank with a blue bow.

Even better is this black floral sundress with beading accents.

It’s definitely a little edgier than the frilly pink tank top, but I like it when Jenny wears clothes with more edge.

The dress she designs for Laurel but ends up wearing herself to the White Party is as frilly and innocent as they come, but it’s definitely lovely on her.

Love the cream lace and the square neckline, finished with a simple sash around her waist.  She looks fresh and age-appropriate.

Laurel, Eleanor’s assistant and Jenny’s torturer, is a statuesque beauty who lives and breathes high fashion.  Her simple cream blouse trimmed in black is gorgeous on her.

She punches it up a notch for the White Party, looking sleek and sophisticated in a simple white wrap dress that shows off her long legs.

Jenny was horrible to Eric all during season one, but he’s apparently a fan of forgive and forget, because he still takes her call, gets her invited to the White Party and even introduces her to Tinsley Mortimer.

Why do they put Eric in such horribly boring clothes?  I know he’s essentially a kid on summer vacation but it’s not like this show is based in reality.  I’d love to see him in something more interesting than a boring gray shirt with dark shorts.

Or this blue striped button-up.

This shirt has a little Chuck Bass flair, with the embroidered green medallions.

And for the White Party, he’s breaking new ground by wearing. . . .white!

Honestly, he looks kind of mis-matched (too many colors of white and cream in one outfit?) and sloppy.  I would think being Chuck Bass’s brother, he would have a higher personal expectation for himself.

Oh Rufus.  What are we going to do with you?

This is an incredibly boring, incredibly unsurprising choice for Rufus.  I’ve honestly given up that he’ll ever manage to get out of the plaid shirt rut he’s in. Le snore.