The Spanish Teacher - Part 1 of 2 - ¡Estar de Moda!

Episode Synopsis: There's a tenured position open at McKinley High, and Principal Figgins has Sue and Will going head to head AGAIN for the spot. Sue wants to have a baby and start a family once she's got tenure, but Will has the same idea for himself and Emma. The problem is that Sue is a jerk and Will is a terrible Spanish teacher. His frustrations increase when he starts taking night classes to brush up on his Español and meets David Martinez (RICKY MARTIN) the suave night school teacher who harbors a love for singing, dancing, and glee clubs. When David shows the New Directions kids his moves, everyone agrees that Will needs to work a little bit harder at his job. Mercedes is having issues; she wants to be with Sam, but she is still with her big football playin' boyfriend Shane, and doesn't want to hurt anyone. Emma advises Mercedes and Sam to stop talking to one another for a week to see how they really feel. Meanwhile, Emma is getting the brunt of Will's anxiety about tenure, Rachel tells Kurt and Mercedes about Finn's proposal, Kurt yells at Finn for giving up on himself, swim coach Roz Washington calls out Sue on how old and out of touch she is, and everyone realizes how tough the coming months will be as school comes to an end. Aaaand that's what you missed on GLEE!

Just to start us off on a high note, I want to show off how consistently sweet and lovely Emma Pillsbury is. EVERY EPISODE.

Yes, it's prim and proper and old-fashioned sweet, but it's also very current. We all know she shares Quinn's love of Anthropologie and has a personal stash of Kate Spade.

Exhibit B! Kate Spade skirt with a city skyline. BOOM. So adorable and so simple!

This polka dot day dress was absolutely stunning. I often feel that Emma could walk in and out of Katharine Hepburn/Spencer Tracy film with little to no alterations to her current wardrobe. That's classy.

Kurt is just so dapper sometimes I can hardly stand it. I mean, his motivation in the scene is to go convince Finn not to give up on himself before they've even graduated college and THIS is what he wears into the men's weight room: a belted gray sporting jacket, khakis tucked into boots, and a black turtleneck. Beautiful choices, Kurt my man.

Let's take a second to appreciate Brittany's face. Yes. Okay. Now let's move on to Doctor Quinn: Fashionable Woman. She's rocking a very springy look: I love the watercolor tone of the scarf against the khaki jacket, and when she stands up the dress is really unique too.

The piping trim on the jacket matches the red in the dress. Nice touch! Also, I can't say enough how much I love her haircut. Her long locks were so gorgeous, but this short 'do really does it for me. This is a girl who is taking control of her life.

Weirdly enough, I really find myself drawn to Sugar's outfits. The minute she opened her mouth in that first episode I though, "I don't know if I can handle this," but her wardrobe is so interesting and 70's chic. The furry vest and leopard print top is a combo that I might steer clear of, but Sugar Motta is fearless.

Seriously, I'm beginning to wonder if she pilfered her clothes from Jackie's closet on That 70's Show. The tawny jacket is really cute! (Also, I love Sugar's reactions to things. She's making faces to rival La Ricci's Bitchface Collection... but with a less bitchy edge.)

Okay, I love that Mercedes is rocking a super springy pink lip color with a top that matches. On some people I don't really dig the matching lip thing, but on Mercedes? It's classy. Classy like the sequin-lapel tuxedo jacket she's wearing. Awwww yiss.

Also this color blue looks great on her, and I love her hair. Mercedes is confidence personified! Except for the fact that she's in lurve with two guys... ummm....

Let's just take a second and stare at RICKY MARTIN. I mean, David Martinez, the Spanish teacher. Holy cow. The hair. The shoulders. The bod. I'm having flashbacks to the late 90's when he first started making music... yowza.

In accordance with how glorious RICKY MARTIN is, Santana pairs up with him to do Madonna's "La Isla Bonita" while wearing a red, red lip and a sassy black romper... dang girl.

For some reason I sort of want to watch "Selena" now. Is that wrong?

The Spanish Teacher - Part 2 of 2 - ¡Que Mala Suerte!

This week saw the continuation of the Sue Sylvester Track Suit Infinity Loop with the following eye-popping gems:

I will say in Sue's defense that her makeup is considerably softer than what it used to be, and I appreciate the little things.

Bronze-medal Olympian swim coach Roz Washington has it out for Sue. She's even wearing loud windbreakers to compete with Sue's track suits, and she insists on wearing her bronze medal with every outfit, all the time. (Although, I pause to reflect: if I had won an Olympic Medal, would I not be considering wearing it all the time as well???)

Mike Chang, I am concerned about this outfit. The cardigan has white sleeves attached to a green body, and there are elbow patches that are neither color. Then, you have a white henley underneath, which makes the cardigan look like a strange vest instead of a cardigan, and the color you chose for your trousers looks more like the Crayola hue "goldenrod" than casual khaki slacks. I am concerned about this overall because the look is confusing. (And where is Tina Cohen-Chang?? I didn't see her the entire episode.)

What....is happening here?

Hmm. What's this? Artie, your sweater... it's unusual but most of your wardrobe usually is.

 

Oh no. What's that? I though they might be weird phone booths or something, but no. It clearly says "HOTEL." Artie, WHERE did that come from??? I'm pretty sure you just won some kind of insane sweater award, because I am totally flummoxed as to what to say about that pattern.

Mr. Schue, how many times have I had to tell you? Corduroy jackets do not go with black ties. How unfortunate. (It's mystifying to me how in some episodes, Will is totally on top of his game and knows all the words to the hip new songs, but in this instance, he doesn't know any of the words and he's totally overshadowed by Señor Hottie Martinez.)

This is a little better, but still boring. A gray shirt with a black tie and black sweater? While Emma prances around looking like a fairy tale come true? Step up, Will.

Heavens to Murgatroyd. What.

Finn. I know Sam made you all wear bolo ties (and weird shoes) for the number, but it's still a bolo tie and it's awful. Wait. WAIT. Finn, are you wearing a SHORT-SLEEVED button down shirt with a bolo tie? Oh. Oh, Finn... no.

Sam, your new haircut and your adorable passion for Mercedes is almost enough to make me ignore the bolo ties. But not quite enough.

Mmmhmm. This is much better. Casual and brooding.

Normally this kind of blandness would be unacceptable, but considering he's wearing hand-me-downs and donations while his family is still in poverty, I'll give him a pass on this one.

Now go get Mercedes back, you lucky dog you!

Mini-Recap: The Spanish Teacher

It's Ricky Martin night! Except thankfully, not through his music. So instead it's Latin Music Night, hosted by  David Martinez, former tooth model and night school Spanish teacher. And one of Mr. Schue's many Latin friends. Or his only one. While Schue, Sue Sylvester (who is somewhat inappropriately looking for sperm from students), and Roz Washington (bronze medallist) are gunning for the coveted tenure position, Emma adorably doles out advice via pamphlets to Mercedes and Sam, and also tells them to spend the week not talking. Although that didn't seem to fix their relationship problem, which is namely the large dude Mercedes calls her boyfriend.

Song of the Night: I'm not sure how they were able to afford the light show, but Santana and Ricky Martin on La Isla Bonita was pretty solid.

Melodramatic Rachel Solo of the Week:  There wasn't one! But if you wanted an awkward solo, Mr. Schue's Mariachi Elvis number hit all the right notes.

Santana's Snark: "While I love that we're getting all Lima Sound Machine in here, why now?'

How Sue Sees It: "I've known ever since I've tinker tailored soldier spied my way into Figgins' cabinet."

Outfit of the Week:  Emma Pillsbury in polka dots is a dream! The polka dot skirt was cute, but the polka dot dress was downright delightful

Worst Outfit of the Week:  Bolo ties! So. Many. Bolo. Ties. And just so wrong.

Tracksuit count:  5 

Stop back on Friday to see Alyson's recap!