My Name Is Trouble - Part 1 of 2 - "Who Does She Think She Is?"

Episode Synopsis: It’s my first Pretty Little Post and I’m so happy to be back! Now onto the show... unless you want to talk about me some more? Alright, fine I’ll get back to work. First off, someone needs to prescribe Spencer some anti-anxiety medication or she needs to start drinking because girl is wrapped up tighter than Mariah Carey in a red carpet dress. It doesn’t help that the rest of the girls are seeing Ian at every chance they get. Meanwhile, Emily shows off some of the secret service tactics she’s picked up by forging a college scholarship letter. I thought she was the shy one? Hanna is simultaneously playing matchmaker and homewrecker with Lucas and her dad, Tom, respectively. Sass and class - Hanna’s got it all. Aria started a class at the local university where her BF Ezra “Six-Pack-For-Dayz” Fitz is teaching. Will someone catch their between class make-outs? Oh yeah, that’s bound to happen. However, the real treat this week was Toby doing yard work. Shirtless. Sure, Spencer stole Melissa’s wedding ring and pawned it to buy Toby a truck but next to his body, that’s a minor plot point, right?
 

Good lord Emily, do you live in that bathroom or are you just visiting? I loved when staffer Ann assigned Spice Girl Spirits for the Liars but this ensemble makes me want to change Emily from Sporty Spice to I’ve Given Up On Life Spice. If I wasn’t single and didn’t have two cats, I would have made a cat lady joke. A joke which is now, on me. ::sigh::

Now this is the Emily I know and have lukewarm feelings for. The scene where Emily and Pam have a brief heart to heart about Emily liking girls was cute. However, it didn’t make me like Emily any more, or less, than I already did. But as a card carrying member of the gay community (it’s true - I have a card) it’s my duty to point out any favourable storylines; it’s kind of our “thing”. Wearing a shirt with pattern or texture is always going to look fashionable on Emily because otherwise it looks like she dresses in rags. If you’re going baggy, for the love of Cher, have something that defines the fabric.

 

Preppy? Check. Glamour? Check. What you can only describe as “Aria”? Check. These girls certainly know how to make an entrance in a public bathroom. I died watching this scene because for one, it’s SO high school to have a clandestine meeting in the bathroom, but also because they all strut out of the stalls in unison. How very Mean Girls.

This might look like two different photos - and it is - however, it is NOT two different days. I’m hardly going to begrudge Hanna a midday costume change because I rock that on the regular. I will ask why she went through the bother of changing from a simple flowing pink top to a simple striped t-shirt. Ladies (and lady fabulous men reading this site), if you’re going to change, let your friends know that you can step up your game. Otherwise, I’m going to think all you own is pretty workout gear; and we’ve already got one Emily in our lives.

 

I think this photoset perfectly captures what makes Hanna such a fashionably cryptic lady. On the right, you’ve got Hanna channeling the wife of a congressman before she heads off to school, and on the left you have a rawker chick who just discovered Joan Jett. Obviously, I’m smitten with the congress look because it’s just chic. Cream skirt with bold black buttons? Why are the 1940s and 50s romanticized these days? Oh right - this stuff.

Don’t be modest, Right Panel Spencer. That humble brag sneer you’ve got on your face doesn’t detract from the adorable outfit you’re rocking. OK, I know we all love the coat but can we fixate on her top for a moment? Cute.com/youregivingmethevapours. Spencer is a believable fashion character to me because they’re not afraid to show her in shambles at home, while having her kill it in the real world. Can anyone of us say we haven’t slummed around the house in an ill-fitting sweatshirt and (lord knows how old) slouchy pants? I mean, take out fearing there’s a serial killer next door thing, and Spencer looks like me on a Sunday. A good Sunday.

Is that a pick or a scratch? Doesn’t matter, I’m stuck on the bangle Wonder Woman is sporting in this photo. Although, it doesn’t beat the fabulously skeptical classmate lurking over Spencer’s shoulder in the hallway scene. Is he loving or critiquing her fantastic belted skirt? Who can tell - gays are so fickle. Trust me, I know. *wink*

“I know you’re hiding Ian.”

“Really? You’re not going to say a thing about how I wear chains now?”

Now let’s play what promises to be my new favourite game: Smock Or Not A Smock? Seriously, could you tell at first? I know she’s in a pottery class but if Aria wore this in any other scene, you wouldn’t question whether or not it was requisite potter garb. This is why I love Aria a whole bunch. She’s turning into my new Carrie Bradshaw i.e. a chick who wears whatever she wants and it works. It’s all I’ve ever wanted for my own style.

“Guys. GUYS. Enough about Ian for a minute... can y’all see my feathers?”

If this is Aria’s stealth fashion this season, then sign me up. When chunky jewelry doesn’t blend in at the stroke of midnight, you better believe it’s a loud piece. Call me crazy but, looking at this photo, I kind of like Aria with this Twiggy style hair. This begs the question: can you be a Pretty Little Liar with short hair? (because they’s all rocking extensions)

 

My Name Is Trouble - Part 2 of 2 - "Who Do They Think They Is?"

I have to say, there wasn't a whole lot happening with the supporting cast this week which is quite disappointing. Maybe we really do need Mona to pop in and class the joint up once in a while...

Aww, look how cute they look together! Add on the possibility of getting caught and I'm downright swooning over here. Aria's dress looks amazeballsUSA, but then again, she has to class it up if she's taking college classes now. It's clear that Ezra's new found freedom has gone to his head because he's wearing his shirt slightly unbuttoned. Oh you cad, sir. You rakish fop - button that up lest we see your collarbone! But seriously, when can we see you topless again?

*cat noise* *record scratch* *spit take* I'm going to sound like a total loser here but when Ezra pulled Aria across the couch by her booty, I damn nearly died. He's all, "I'm in a robe and I got my piece. Go get you some", except he's not exactly straight thugging in his cotton robe. Still, I do love putting mismatched dialogue into characters mouths.

Flashback Filter? Odd colour wash? Alison's in the house! There's nothing especially scandalous to report here fashion wise. However, in the character department, we finally saw some emotion bubble underneath her lioness like visage proving that the Queen Bee was not immune to feeling and acting like a human female.

Alison is totally dressed for a sleepover compared to...

these broads right here. Not that they aren't dressed for a sleepover but when I think of a prime time teen drama with girly sleepovers, I don't immediately picture polka dot robes and hoodies. I guess I've just been conditioned by popular culture to think that all girly sleepovers involve one really sexy teen wise beyond her years, three middle of the road lemmings and the "odd" girl who, with the right amount of styling, can become the really sexy teen. I'm talking Jawbreaker, Heathers, Empire Records, The Breakfast Club... you name it and I've described the casting process.

Another season of Jenna's glasses looms on the horizon. At least she's dressing her age again. I'm in love with this t-shirt but that's mostly because I bought one very similar at American Apparel recently. Predictable, thy name is Anthony. We can't play the Smock/Not-A-Smock game with Jenna because she lacks the boho flair of Aria. Maybe these classmates will start to exchange fashion tips? Hmm? Yeah, I'm not holding my breath.

"I'm the best mom in the world!" - oh, Ashley Marin, I do love you. I'm sure that falls under the penchant gay men have for brassy broads who aren't afraid to speak their mind. Or because of this screencap. For serious, I laugh everytime I look at it. I'm laughing now as I type and my roommate is asking me why clothes are so funny. He doesn't get it. If Ashely wore black every day, I'd be OK with that because girlfriend seems to have an endless supply of necklaces that make her clothes pop.

Pam, you are the most normal mom on Pretty Little Liars. She's always styled and put together but never over the top. I'm more apt to believe a mom character if I see her in a sweatsuit once; just once, and then we're cool. It makes me think back to the days when my mom was in her track suit phase. Adorable. There was a bit of a cute explosion when Pam read Emily's fake scholarship letter because she was just so darn excited. Look at that screencap! Presh.

Welcome to the Gallery of Minor Female Characters. Starting in the bottom left, we have Jackie who just caught Ezria in a totally steamy campus lip lock. It's either that or she's shocked that the title of Sexiest Professor no longer belongs to her. Whatever. Moving to the right you may feast your eyes on Lucas' new crush, Danielle. And of course, you will be trapped by her Bowie-esque shag that she's styled her hair into. I'm not getting down on it because I love the style. I will get down on the fact that this clearly does not shape her head well. Look, we've all had major hairstyles we've wanted to try, and we've all failed miserably at them. My advice: find a cut that works for you and hold on with the grip of Paz de La Huerta on a wine bottle. On the top row, Melissa is looking pensive and frustrated as usual. My question is, if she was really missing her wedding ring, and she was REALLY searching the Hastings House top to bottom, how did she miss that rock behind the toaster? Maybe she was concentrating on how she'll be able to keep her bitch face constant throughout this season. January Jones called - she wants her schtick back.

Boys, boys, boys! I'm not wild for the new Jason, I'm sorry. His hair is too floppy, he wears silver chains and he doesn't have that All-American look that I somehow imprinted on back in the day. He's eye-candy for sure but not my type. Why would he be my type when there are total DILFs running around like Tom. But then how can I betray my nerd crush, Lucas? I mean, if didn't already fall in love with his booty shorts last season, this t-shirt that says "Nerds Love Apple Pie" in symbols definitely sealed the deal. Hmm... on closer inspection, I seem to be in heat. At any rate, fashionable men in the PLL world just need a solid t-shirt with heather detail to get by. Lucky.

OF COURSE I was going to end this week with our favourite trending topic, Shirtless Toby! Hoot! It's funny, when he's at school and runs into Spencer, it looked like he and Emily were wearing the same thing. Toby obviously noticed as well, which is why he decided to take off his shirt because ain't no way Ems can compete with that. Oh, and the little tattoo shot? Priceless. OK, I definitely need to stop before I get a reputation i.e. the lecherous 'mo on staff. Sigh, it's been a good week kids.

Mini Recap: My Name is Trouble

The girls try to find their own interests and not surprisingly their extra-curricular activities bring them all together. But the BIG moment was the "I love you" between Toby and Spencer...so presh. 

Drama-rama du jour
Who is Melissa sneaking out to see??

Best Outfit
While a great case can be made for that gorgeous hunk at left, Hanna's first school outfit with the high-waisted skirt (or was it a dress) and double buttons was adorable. 
[Can we also make note of Ashley's hair--the PLLs hairstylist finally got her hands on the ginger!] 

Gratuitous Male Shirtlessness
Just 1. And it was fine. Fine, fine, fine Toby :)  

Best "A" Message
"You can't play cat and mouse if the mouse moves to Texas. I need you here."

Current "A" suspect
Jason may be A or the new theory: he killed Alison. 

Anthony's recapping all the juiciness this week. Check back on Friday!