Hanna plays Rosewood Jumanji and struggles with the idea that Lucas might be connected to AD; Spencer is the cops’ prime suspect and needs gets a little help from Hanna and Caleb to destroy evidence; Hot Cop knows what’s up, but can’t prove anything; Emmison finally say ‘I love you’ and start making plans for as a family, which will naturally end in tears; Aria doubles down on being on Team AD and Spencer is getting suspicious because no one knows shady like a Hastings.   

Since the game hates her and she has to take a second turn, Hanna is the Liar who gets to shhhhhhush us this week.

Poor Hanna. First another go at the game (at least it’s low stakes — just picking up and dropping off a hard drive with some Patsy Cline) and then this week’s nightmare of a bomber jacket.

This time it looks like someone skinned a disco ball.  And the western-wear-inspired double buckle from the early 90s is doing her waistline no favors.

But the giant earrings are a great choice and I’m here for them. If only the rest of her outfit could live up to their potential. 

Also, can AD quit it with the fat shaming already?

Kthx.

She does finally escapes the tyranny of the bomber jacket and replaces it for military-inspired cropped jacket paired with a last days of disco gold cami.

The 80s vibe is strong in this episode, but after complaining about bomber jackets for a few weeks, this jacket and cami are like a breath of fresh air.

After asking Mona for help last week, she’s all “ennnhhhhh, I don’t know, Mona” this week. Is it because Mona’s dressed like a politician’s wife?

And not a particularly stylish one? She needs to get over that — because they really need a former evil genius on their side. Fortunately, Mona doesn’t take no for an answer and helps out anyway. No sign of AD of course since we now know about the secret locker.

Hanna really knows how to recruit helpers, though. In addition to Mona, she’s got Caleb setting up security systems with a convenient ten-minute window to shut down the system.

Just enough time to pour (a lot of) water on any evidence that might incriminate Spencer. Hot Cop, naturally, is really pissed about this.

Fair. But like every cop this town has learned, when it comes to murder, these girls are like Teflon. (Mostly because A/AD can’t torture them if they’re in prison for multiple murders and a few dozen felonies).

Speaking of trying to pin murders on these girls, Spencer is in the hot seat.

Doesn’t she know that she has the right to an attorney and to remain silent? I mean, this is not her first time at the rodeo. She’s obviously not directing this week because her hair has the Rosewood wave in it. The denim jacket is the worst thanks to an ill-advised elasticized waist.

It’s like a bad flashback from 1989. The sweater is super cute and super Spencer though.

But no amount of argyle or polka dots can save that look.

She doubles down on the v-necks this week, following up the fitted sweater with a loose sweatshirt/ structural blouse combo.

Like many of the plots in this series, it’s kind of all over the map and I like it.

While Hanna is being super proactive about dealing with Spencer’s f-up on the night they murdered and buried a dude (pro-tips: don’t drink alone at the bar when you’ve finished burying a body. And definitely don’t carry a dead guy’s credit cards in your wallet), Spencer’s plan is to appeal to Marco’s feelings and ask him to let this murder slide.

Surprise! He totally says no and tells her to GTFO. We may have actually met the first good cop in Rosewood history. Naturally, Spencer steals a flash drive with Lucas’s name on it and tells Furey he can’t tell anyone because it would look super shady for him to have let her in his apartment.

She’s got some serious relationship issues to work on.

After viewing the flash drive, we learn that Lucas threw all the girls under the bus after Charlotte’s murder. He also has the copy of Arcturus.

So the Liars do the typical Liar confrontation and just as quickly as he became a suspect he turns into the red herring we suspected all along.

Yes, he knew Charles. No, he didn’t know she was Charlotte. Turns out they were only email friends post-camp and he sent a lot of emails complaining about Ali and her minions in high school. (for what it’s worth, didn’t Ali go missing in freshman year? So all of this is over middle school and not high school – right? Or am I just losing the plot in all the seasons I’ve seen?) He also fesses up that there’s a second unfinished issue of their graphic novel – and this one turns revenge into a game.

He also admits he bet it all on Hanna and lost his money, but doesn’t care because he clearly loves Hanna. Poor kid.

 

Thanks to Mrs. D’s well stocked and organized attic, Emily starts decorating a nursery just a little too early.

Like, maybe hit the four-month mark first, girlfriend. I guess it’s great that Mrs. D kept every damn thing because Ali seems moved by it and asks Emily to move in. It’s another great blouse on Emily this week, except it’s basically a variation on last week’s blouse. The leather slip-on sneakers are a nice touch though. 

Like almost every episode ever, we get make note that Emily is nothing if not boring fashion wise. Shay Mitchell must be itching to be shed this role and its same old same old looks. Like, how many gray tees and varsity jackets can one girl wear in seven seasons?

Always room for one more, I suppose!  

Ali does have to suffer through another navy jacket/floral top combo this week.

But at least she gets to trade it in for a pale pink leather jacket and baby blue blouse.

The blousy tee feels a wee bit frumpy, but I guess I can’t harsh on an oversized floral top too much if it’s maternity wear. Is it maternity wear? How far along is she? Who the hell knows at this point.  

Whatever. All of this leads to a big moment for Emison with mutual “I love you”s and some kissing.

This can’t end well.  I wish it would, but I just don’t see how it can.

 

Ezra, Worst Fiancé Ever, is now jumping on the wedding planning bandwagon and is suggesting ballroom dancing lessons.

Apparently, he’s a 65-year-old man trapped in the body of a 39-year-old, because he references the electric slide for out of date dance moves. I think he means the Macarena because that was the embarrassing dance of his youth.  Another whatever, because he’s a day late and a dollar short for planning something romantic. Aria has moved on to the dark side with a varsity themed jacket that really isn’t working for me. Especially since it’s a PERSONALIZED varsity jacket.

WTF?

She’s apparently going for high-school inspired this episode because while this sweatshirt is cute, it feels very teen Aria.

Like give her a feather earring, some crazy leggings and I’ll swear this is season 4A.

Apparently, Ezra’s publicist really wants him to dial back the Aria love and focus on Nicole for his book tour. Considering they’ve been national news, she’s not wrong. Of course, he doesn’t really listen to her and focuses on Aria who’s all ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ about whether he brings her up or not (a big change from earlier this season).

Mostly because she’s traded in wedding planning to work on her arts and crafts with this creepy mobile for baby Emison.

She’s also trashing that nursery like she’s PETA and it’s a fur coat.

After all those seasons of breaking in places, she’s pretty much the worst burglar ever. She’s almost caught by Emily, cuts her arm, and leaves an earring behind (doesn’t notice she’s not wearing it) and gets major side-eye from Spencer when it’s found.

But I’m really into her post-break-in outfit.

While I’m not into the Members Only cut of this week’s leather jacket, that teal is A++. Especially with that delightful gold print tee.

I want to know where she got that necklace. 

 

Alright, you guys! Four episodes left to go. I’m still betting on Dark Aria with a split personality or Secret Twin Spencer. They haven’t offered me any clues to believe otherwise. Some questions I have (one for each remaining episode):

  1. Will any of the other parents return? Or have they just quit the show?
  2. What the hell happened to Holden? And how many other characters will randomly show up for an episode or two and then disappear again?
  3. How many more red herrings do we have to endure?
  4. Will Hanna wear four more bomber jackets?