What Mindy Wore On Maternity Leave

Oh baby! Mindy finally arrives home with adorable, forever ethnically-ambigious son, Leo Castellano. Of course, Danny is as predictably overprotective and emotional as Leo is unpredictably an angel/robot TV baby that never cries or fusses (seriously wtf). After Danny goes to extreme levels to babyproof the house (removing the TV was extreme, but taking the booze is personal) and forcing Mindy to stay home until Leo gets his shots, Mindy can’t deal with sitting in the apartment all day doing nothing. But doesn’t this give her more time to shop online for “Mommy and Baby” matching outfits? Damn Mindy, you’re doing this maternity leave thing all wrong.

Mindy’s post-birth star-print romper is probably the best outfit in this episode. Guys–I don’t look this good ever, let alone after pushing a baby out of my body for numerous hours. 

I love everything about this outfit, including that leather jacket on her arm that she’s not even wearing. 

 

And sure, she may be overdoing it with the pigtail braids this episode, but look how comfortable and casual she looks. Like literally–she woke up like dis (after having a baby).

Unfortunately, Danny is doing that whole overprotective father thing by removing all the screens in the house including the booze. I mean, what is he thinking?! Every mother I know DEPENDS on having booze in the house. Err, I mean, screens.

 

I don’t know about you guys, but if I ever have kids, Imma be in pajamas all day errrr day. Like these adorable pineapple pajamas:

There might be nothing I love more than fruits on pajamas. Except maybe fruits on shirts. Skirts. Dresses. Bags. Shoes. 

 

And sure, Leo may be obstructing Mindy from any adult freedom, but at least she can Baroness Von Tramp the shit out of this baby. 

 

 

Matching moms and babies are a few of my favorite things.

I am soooo matching my baby in every print of pajamas I own. Mindy is fed up though. It’s been 3 TV hours (maybe 2) (maybe 1) (30 minutes) (who knows), and she needs to get out of house arrest. I don’t know what her problem is. Besides the fact that you have to take care of a tiny, fragile human being who is your responsibility and yours alone, maternity leave sounds pretty great–you just stay home from work and wear cute pajamas all day. Right?

Luckily for us though, she gets out of the house to see the Gyllenhaals sign their new cookbook (Grillin’ Haul: best fake celeb name for a cookbook) in this perfectly put-together romper and jacket ensemble.

I don’t even know where to start. Jade green leather jacket, jean romper, white print t-shirt. Perfect coming out outfit. Also, subtle–you know, for sneaking out of the house.

 

Nothing bad happens on TV without consequence. So, of course, she accidentally locks her new baby inside her apartment and, of course, Danny’s coming home at that exact moment. That’s TV, folks!

 

Thanks to her sexually active neighbor who is always home, she jumps over the side of her highrise building to her apartment balcony. I mean, this is pretty brave (maybe dumb?). I probably would’ve gone with the human bridge instead…

Also, can someone tell me how she can pull this jean romper off? Is this humanly possible for anyone who’s not a toddler or a hipster who forages vegetables for a living?

 

Of course, Danny eventually finds out Mindy left the house… but that’s ok, because Mindy learns worse news about Danny. Two words: NANNY CAM.  

Pissed, Mindy goes to a bar, meets some terrible bro-ey fathers, and realizes Danny isn’t so bad.

What she doesn’t realize is that she’s definitely now overdid the pigtail + the pajama ensemble in this episode, but honestly–she looks so cute, I’m going to let it slide.

 

Next week, she’s headed back to work! Anyone else excited about no more pajamas and more matching Mom and Baby outfits???