With Emily and Queen V poised for their final ice queen shade throwing gala, the has come to pour one out for the soap that was. Remember how excited we all were when this little soap first took the world by storm? Oh, how we shook our fists yelling “Reveeeeeenge!” while accidentally spilling our TV wine at every Red Sharpie takedown. Nobody can deny that first season was instant classic, NOBODY because it was FLAW FREE. And from there… well… so maybe this show’s had slighly more than its fair share of rough seasons patches. Still, even when the plots were mired in Initiative/Fa1con/Jack’s Bar/Declan shenanigans, the wardrobe department never once let us down. Our team of recappers convened on the YKYLF Scheming Balcony with some brandy to come up with this list of the top 10 things we’ll miss most of all.
10. Over the shoulder hugs
I will always remember the utter glee with which I shook my fist at the sky and shouted “REVENGE!!!” every time someone hugged someone else while simultaneously glaring forebodingly over their shoulder. – Constance
Agreed. The over-the-shoulder glares were such an integral part of their story telling and disappeared without a trace. Like many secondary characters. – Anthony
9. Emily and Nolan’s BFF-ship
Remember how at the beginning of season one, we weren’t sure if Nolan was a secret half-brother, a future love interest, or just the best dressed TV man since Chuck Bass? The show quickly realized Mr. Ross brought out Emily’s soft side, and made him the most fabulous Girl Friday this side of Rosalind Russell. And if you don’t know that allusion, trust me: Nolan does. – Ann
8. The Galas
THE GALAS. Every week there was a new gala. They had galas to plan galas. Remember the one where Victoria fainted like she was on a telenovela? There were masks involved and it was just before Patrick came on the scene as her oddly protective minion. – Anthony
7. The Plotting Balcony
Shoutout to Victoria and Daniel’s never not inappropriately Oedipal relaysh and all those times they hung out on Victoria’s Balcony o’ Scheming while Victoria was wearing a silk negligee. – Constance
The plotting balcony with a brandy! – Jen
6. Emily’s Thorne’s Classic Capers
Although all we ever saw her learn at Takeda’s Revenge Skool was various ways to survive waterboarding, apparently her extracurricular was in costuming. Because when it came time to scheme, girl had an endless supply of disguises, tech gadgets and/or wigs. – Ann
5. The Nolan Ross Nonstop Fashion Hour
Put this fella next to Chuck Bass and let’s see what happens. My guess is a clash of silken fabrics and patterns resulting in myself, and many ladies around the world, gasping at the top of our lungs. – Anthony
4. Grayson Family Values
Remember that time Daniel was secretly a poet but Conrad forced him to give it up so he could fulfill his Grayson destiny? – Constance
Major shout out to when Victoria would wear lacey dressing gowns while she beat her mug in front of her American Girl vanity set. – Anthony
Victoria’s best shade: tie between the time she gave Emily a tastefully wrapped empty box as an engagement present and the time she told Lydia, “Every time I hug you, you’ll feel the warmth of my hatred.” – Constance
I’ve always wondered for all those times Connie was booted out of the manse, why did he keep staying at that awful B&B? He’s Conrad Grayson – the man could afford *at least* a stylish waterfront Airbnb. Did he have some yen for doilies, pinstripe wallpaper and super tacky sconces? – Anthony
3. The Day Players
YOU GUYS, CRAZY TYLER. And his weird Taxi Driver speech while he was ready to pop everyone at the clambake on the beach? Poor Ashley didn’t see it coming, poor Nolan lost his side piece. Gay folks can’t catch a break in Montauk! – Anthony
I’m pretty sure Margaux won best outfit of the week every week since she first appeared on the show. And I can’t count the number of women who’ve gotten ill-advised pixie and/or bobs due to her influence. – Ann
Ashley, whose purpose on the show was never apparent, whose ferocious outfits were always hidden behind set dressing, who was Emily’s BFF/enemy/Daniel’s girlfriend/Conrad’s slampiece/Grayson party planner/Grayson PR flunkie/former prozzie… wait, why did she leave the show? – Ann
Lydia Davis. I love when crazy is this beautiful. – Anthony
Who can forget Fauxmanda, arriving on the scene with her gorgeous hair and short shorts full of secrets? Girl was such a hot mess. – L-A
I just Googled “guy with bowtie Revenge” because I couldn’t remember Mason Treadwell’s name. Remember when he was trying to be a Truman Capote/Jessica Fletcher composite but it was just an endless parade of knitted sweater vests and clashing bowties? – Anthony
Sam The Dog. You can pretend you didn’t cry during this scene, but YOU WILL BE LYING. – Jen
1. Emily Thorne, Fashion Icon
Real talk: this show would never have happened without Emily Van Camp’s flaw free portrayal of the badass ninja (with the secret heart of gold). The contrast between her dirty deeds and her Kate Middleton-meets-The-Hamptons style made it all the more fun to watch. Here are some of our fav looks from the past four seasons:
Lady in Red.
Bond Girl Realness.
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Blonde Kate Middleton Engagement Photo Glamor.
Grieving Black Widow.
von Furstenburg Femme Fatale.
Bodycon Masquerade Diva.
The Real Housewife of Montauk.
And The Winner is…
Legs For Days.
A Day at the Races.
Betty Draper Death Stare.
Honorable mention: Falling off of balconies
That time Victoria threw pregnant Fauxmanda off a balcony. Up there with soapiest moment of all time, for sure. – Constance
And Nolan witnessing Frank push Lydia off of a balcony – and she was totally not dead! – Jen
Honorable Mention: The Green Screen
Staring at the ocean/green screen in a magnificent cable knit sweater after a Revenge (!!!). – L-A
Oh, the green screen was super awful in the early episodes. – Jen
Honorable Mention: That Time Falcon Was Emily’s Foster Brother
Yeah, I’d forgotten about that too. – Ann
Honorable Mention: Gratuitous Male Shirtlessness
Um, obvz. – Jen
… And OK, one more. You had to know this was coming:
Honorable Mention: The Red Sharpie of Doom
Thanks for sticking through these past four years of recaps. Check out our full archive of Revenge-caps, starting with episode one, and we’ll see you to goss on the series finale (!!!) Sunday night! xo – YKYLF