This week on THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN EMILY AND NOLAN DON’T HANG OUT ENOUGH: Louise is going full Betty Draper in her sham marriage to Nolan, which turns him into Don Draper, which is not going to lead these two anywhere good. Meanwhile, it turns out I was wrong and Margaux intentionally miscarrying  not only was it totes an accident, but she now feels bad about blaming Emily. Has there ever been a more wishy-washy villain ever? Luckily, Victoria’s stepping up to take revenge (!!!), which means she steps into some serious Maleficent chic this week. As a final twist, Emily steps up and announces her true identity to the world, surprising everyone, including her ostensible BFF. When Emily and Nolan don’t get bestie time, stuff like this happens, you guys!!


This Week’s Targets
V’s out to get Emily again, which is so much more satisfying than watching her plan parties or whatever. Meanwhile, Emily’s got a reverse-vendetta as she sets out to clear Daniel’s name.

Gala/Caper of the Week
All the big shots came out for the opening of the Not Daniel Grayson Memorial Wing of the hospital! I don’t think this show’s done a literal groundbreaking before, so golf claps for trying something new.

Best Dressed
Queen V and Margaux were both working some ferosh grieving villain chic with Margaux’s structured menswear insired ensemble and V’s American Horror Story fashions.

Most Soapy Amazatron Moment:
So the assassin Margaux hired was SPECIAL GUEST STAR COURTNEY LOVE!! First Empire, now this show? I am here for C-Love’s takeover of primetime soaps.


Check back on Wednesday to for Anthony‘s take on this week’s Revenge-tastic shenanigans.