What Jess Wore

Ahh, the wedding: a quintessential season finale go-to. It happens with every show and New Girl had to go through the rite of passage at some point. Through the magic of eye-speak, Schmidt deduces that Cece doesn’t want to marry Shivrang, sets out to sabotage the entire extravaganza with his trusty sidekicks Winston Bucky the Badger. As Jess tries to preempt their shenanigans, she and Nick deal with the doubts surrounding their…um, what are they, anyway? But they kiss in the rain, which is television-code for happy endings. Unfortunately, not everyone got to make out in the downpour seeing as how an Elizabeth-Schmidt-Cece love triangle sprouted. This must be what happens when you don’t have an open bar at the wedding


Jess may have only worn one outfit this week, but it was so gorgeous. Aqua is such a springy, bright, happy color and with the sparkly pink sequin patterns, Jess is fresh and girly. And seriously, how comfy do saris look? I would love to wear that to a wedding. Imagine all the wedding cake you could eat without your control top in the way. That thing is such a cake-block. 



Her earrings were a standout piece for me as well. The gold and green make for a litte contrast to the pink and silver detail of her sari. I approve of non matchy-matchy accessories — makes the whole outfit more creative and interesting. This can, however, backfire horribly…as we’ll see when we check in on Elizabeth.


Despite her lovely earrings, the accessory of the day would have to go to Nick. Someone knows how to introduce a zing of color to a classic navy suit. Shoot, I’d love to add that hot pink purse to my own color palette. 


I wasn’t totally against his first suit. It would be more than appropriate if he were going to a wedding on, say, the beach. Or in someone’s backyard. In the 80s. But, hey, to each his own. I only ask, for the love of everything good, iron it. Whatever the suit is made of, just iron it or get it pressed.  The wrinkles…oh, God, the wrinkles… 


On the other hand, we have the appropriately attired, but entirely misguided prankster pair, Nick and Winston. In standard wedding fare, their suits are tailored and pressed – maybe a mite ho-hum, but they do look handsome plotting their high jinks and wriggling through air ducts. 


Was Elizabeth’s limp, lackluster hair part of the prank? It’s called hair volumizer. Find it. Love it. Live it. Her dress, however, is the complete opposite of lackluster. The colors look great on her, especially that rich blue cardigan, but that print is garish and as confused as Schmidt. Is that a…tropical motif? Are those butterflies or snowflakes? What is happening?? 

And behold! Proof that black does not necessarily go with everything and that contrasting accessories can go terribly awry. Even Nick’s pretty pink purse would’ve gone over better than that black, floppy, envelope disaster.

And here comes the stunning bride (i.e. the third point of the love triangle). Aside from the fact that Cece’s a model and is by default gorgeous and statuesque in anything she wears, she made an exceptionally beautiful bride. The vibrant red fabric, and ornate gold and jewel detail…so elegant and festive. And that headpiece…now that is a statement piece. Snaps to Indian tradition — you’ve got accessorizing on lock.

Bonus: even though she sort of got dumped at the altar, at least she didn’t have last week’s beard.


So what of the new future Mrs. Shivy? His true love, Elaine, is perfect in this pale peach confection with the vintage lace overlay and pink belt. I have no idea what Elaine’s story is, but this definitely looks like a standard Taylor Swift frock — ultra feminine, simple silhouette, and minimal detailing.  It took me awhile to figure out why I found this dress so uncannily familiar and then it hit me: this is totally my senior prom dress. 

So, while Elaine is busy painting portraits of or writing songs about her itty-bitty boyfriend, what’s the rest of the gang going to get up to this summer? Even with Season 2 at an end, it seems like everything’s just beginning. But what will stick next season — the love or the fashion?  


Yeah, my money’s on the fashion, too.