What Jess Wore

Jess and Nick deal with a post-coital surprise visit from Jess’s dad, which goes horribly awry after Nick confesses his wuv for Jessica. Meanwhile, Cece falls asleep on her henna-covered hand and gets henna on her face…the day before her wedding. Bad sign. Schmidt almost loses Elizabeth again, but then crashes her date and asks her to dance in the middle of the restaurant. But whatever guys, because while everyone is too wrapped up in their own business, Winston’s is all Samantha-Baker-in-Sixteen-Candles-sad because everyone forgot his birthday. Get your act together, guys. You may be having the Worst Day Ever, but no situation is bad enough to forget a man’s birthday!

 

So last night was that good huh Jess? Well, next time you go bounding out the door in a cute button down that looks way better on you than Nick (and sans pants because you’re so ready for round two) best be sure your old man hasn’t decided to just pop by. Surprise!

 

Whilst dealing with the awkwardness of Dad Meeting Guy She Just Slept With, Jess gets a call from her teacher friend who is probably the best dressed of the episode. So much love for this navy polka dot blouse with sailor knot paired with the indigo cardi. She’s def got the sexy teacher look down. Give her Jess’s glasses and she could totes be all “Hit Me Baby One More Time!”

 

 

 

No sooner has Jess accepted her friend’s teaching offer when Cece calls in a crisis. But I’m focused on her bea-u-ti-ful sari. I seriously hope Cece goes through with this wedding because I’m dying to see what she wears. The color combo and sparkle on the neckline are so elegant and it doesn’t make her lose her figure. Though as pretty as the sari is, I’d love to see her in a sexy mermaid style dress. Maybe when she marries Schmidt? (Guys, I’m still stuck on them, it’s gonna happen!)

 

Speaking of Schmidt, this happened.

He’s too busy stupid-dancing in public with his ex (who’s not really his ex anymore) to put a stop to Cece’s big day. Though you gotta love their chutzpah…they do got moves, and at least their moves are better than what’s on their bodies. Kitty t-shirt? “Froghettaboutit” sweats? I say NAY!

 

So, back to Jess’s Worst Day Ever. Her dad surprised her and she couldn’t have round two, her dad and Nick are hanging out together alone (!) and talking about girls (!!), and she still hasn’t remembered Winston’s birthday. But through it all, she manages to look super pretty with nary a hair out of place.

Love the pastel Easter Day dress and yellow cardigan. This comes in a very close second to her teacher friend’s outfit. I just can’t shake the image of a five year old wearing the same thing, so she loses points. But I will say that her matching flats def add to the outfit. That’s not an easy color to match, so snaps for finding perfect shoes.

 

Haaaayyy!! I just can’t, I have no words for what is going on here. But I do know that not even Sue Sylvester could pull this off.

What I don’t get is why Winston went all-out on top, and then paired his pleather jumpsuit with such boring shoes. You’ve gotta commit to the look, y’hear?

 

But poor Winston. While Jess is too busy to deal with Cece, she enlists Winston to help. He thinks he’s going to his surprise party, but the only surprise he got was Cece’s face.

Yup, that’s pretty much the right reaction for someone who wakes up with a henna-tatooed face the day before her wedding. God help my maid of honor if something like that ever happens to me. But cheer up Cece, I seriously heart your silk robe! Great colors and fabu pattern! At least you’ve got something going for you.

BTW? If you were marrying Schmidt, this would not have happened. Karma.

 

Finally, Jess makes it to see Cece. And only makes matters worse. 

“Burkas isn’t ‘you guys’ is it?” — Jess (while real-life Zooey tried to stifle her laughter).

 

Jess ends The Worst Day at home, where her dad is blowing up an air mattress in the hallway between her room and Nick’s. Fed up with his interference she goes to bed, only to be woken by a text from Nick. Awww how cute!

 

And of course she shows up in a super adorbs bright pink robe with sexy bed head. And perfect make up. Like whaaaaat? How is that possible?

 

Unfortunately, Nick’s romantic gesture is thwarted when Schmidt and Elizabeth crash to do a little stargazing. And then Winston stumbles up thinking this was a surprise party for him. Woo! He got his Jake Ryan moment!

Yes, everyone realizes they’ve been total asses, and the gang parties like it’s 1984.

Dying to find out if Cece gets the henna off her face goes through with this wedding. And do we think that Schmidt will sweep in and claim his lady love, or has he truly moved on to Elizabeth and her kitty t-shirts?