This week, we learned a few things about New Directions. First, if you let your emotional and physical baggage get in the way of Sectionals, your friends will turn on you faster than Madonna on anyone who appropriates her image. We also learned that they were just one of – what seems like – hundreds of other McKinley High extra-curriculars. And we saw Brittany and Sam almost hook up. The writers have gotten some flack for their meta discussion of the lesbian blogger community, but I thought it was fine. A little overdone, but a nice acknowledgment. Anyway, the real story was happening in New York City with Rachel and Kurt. Again. I don’t think I have to tell you that Rachel sang that house *down*. After that performance, I was surprised Kurt had the gall to try and follow her. Was the fashunz this week anything to write home about? No, but there were a few moments that at least deserve a phone call.
The Most “CRUSHED IT” Moment
Alright. I know some of y’all dislike the Rachel Berry. But I think we need to give her a serious “WERK. IT. GURL” this week. First, the white sequinned gown was so gorgeous I was partially blind for 32-seconds. And the fringe? Or bangs? Whatever you want to call it? What I’m trying to say is her hair was clocked and working double-time and a half. We’ve all noticed that her fashion has really hit its stride now that she’s a Broadway Baby, but this week crushed it. I mean, consider for a moment what Rachel would wear in Ohio if she was fixing to win a competition. We’d be served some short, event inappropriate cocktail dress riddled with tulle and a satin belt. Happy Hanukkah, Ms. Berry – you win.
The Best “Came Crawling Back, Eh?” Moment
Oh, Kurt – always so fierce and desperately sad within. Before we go on though, we need. to talk. about. the HAIR. Porcelain, can it go any higher? I mean, when you brush and blow that out, do you play “Higher” by Creed? Because that’s the only time I think that song is appropriate. It screams desperate, which some might also describe the plea to Ms. Carmen Tibideaux. However, I am in love with that coat and turtleneck combo. It’s formal yet casual, and the saddlebag? Oh, how I love the saddlebag. Clothes? A totally win. Follow up application? Ballsy (and clearly worthwhile).
Not pictured: the ferocious Paul Smith trousers he wore during the impromptu “re-re-audition”.
The Most “I’m A New York City Legend” Outfit
After alluding to the power and fear Carmen Tibideaux has over performers like Rachel and Kurt, of *course* I’m going to show the queen bee herself. That head wrap is set for days and only Whoopi could work this look down. I might dispute the handwriting on those golden tickets to fame she hands out every year, but I’m a little afraid to call bullshit. You know, just in case. That diva look she consistently throws is a little menacing.
The Best “Talent vs. Talent” Moment
If you were to ask me which guest star I prefer this year, SJP or Kate Hudson, I would have one hell of a time giving you a straight answer. Every time Cassandra is involved, she pulls a total bitch move with Rachel that totally makes you root for the kid from Ohio. I don’t think we’ve seen Kate in anything other than sexy black dance gear, but when you’ve pins like hers, why would you wear anything else? In these scenes, it comes down to talent (and sometimes, hair), and as much as I love Cassandra… you’ve got to give it to Rachel and her stash of Helmut coverups. At least this week. Remember that time Kate Hudson did the Dance Again/Americano mash-up? Child, it was on fire.
Worst “Let’s Hate On The Obviously Ill And Vulnerable Girl” Moment
Was anyone else a little put off by how quickly the Glee club dumped all of their problems on the girl with an eating disorder, emotional problems, and endless supply of quirky hats? Tina Cohen-Chang, sit your angray ass down and remember your stage fright and fake stutter routine almost ruined Glee club at the beginning. Granted, Marley’s storyline is all over the map, but instead of supporting her after the loss at Sectionals the group decides to move on to other clubs. Fast. I suppose the basketball team was just gagging for players? And the Cheerios? Or the hockey team? Or whatever the hell else? At any rate, it was great excuse for the wardrobe team to come up with some new uniforms for McKinley. There’s only so much you can do with red, white and black…
Strangest “The Breakfast Club” Moment
Finn Hudson seemed like he had lost his magic at the end of this episode. Even after a patented pep talk, too. It’s hard to motivate people without rehearsal space and Marley’s suggestion of rehearsing outside in the middle of winter was… well… maybe not her first step toward becoming the New Rachel again. But since everything happens at light-speed in Ohio, the Glee club abandons the hatred they all so eloquently expressed hours before so they can have a reunion moment singing “Don’t Dream It’s Over”. But the worst part? None of them wore any cute winter gear. It was all the standard fare of parka-ish coats and plain toque and scarves.
Kurt Hummel would be livid. You know, sometimes I really hate these kids.