This week on You’ve Got Mail Kate by Design Jane By Design, Kate sets up an online dating profile for Gray that India immediately attempts to use to her advantage so she can get Gray fired. Kate’s also busy trying to be a mom to Jane and Ben by replacing their toothbrushes, attending parent/teacher conferences, and organizing Ben’s closet (including his special-interest magazines). Jane’s trying to control the chaos caused by her mother – of course, for Jane, “control” amounts to lots of frantic flailing and phone calls. In the end, Gray skips the date, saving us all from watching Jane careen through a restaurant trying to stop Gray. Also, Zoe has two mute dads, and Amanda was the youngest actress in the history of theater to play Cinderella.

 

I am kicking off this recap with my favorite part of watching TV: extra-spotting. In this case, I’d like to offer a hearty round of golf claps for this extra’s super cute cross-body bag.

Not suited for school (do any of these characters ever carry bookbags??), but so perfect for a trip to the mall.

 

Jane’s giant green bag, on the other hand, could actually carry a notebook if necessary.

Just because she’s in high fashion doesn’t mean Jane has an endless closet. Like any high school girl, Jane repeats clothes, as evidenced by the lip print top. Wish we’d seen a better shot of that jacket, because it looks cute and is a great counterbalance for those roomy pants. 

 

This may be my favorite outfit, ever, in the history of the world. I’m not being hyperbolic, honest.

But how is that not totally adorable? And, more importantly, will a generous reader please buy me this totally adorable apron?

 

I’m not normally a fan of suspenders, but Jane’s thin suspenders work so well with that Peter Pan collar, and both offset yet another of Jane’s absurdly short tutus.

 

 

Jane, honey, you look smashing, but when your purse strap is longer than your skirt, it’s time to start thinking about adding an inch of hemline.

 

Normally, Jane is spot-on with her work wardrobe. For once, I do not approve of her choice for an afternoon at Donovan Decker.

For an evening in the club, though, that short metallic skirt and Elizabeth and James “Bruce” jacket would be badass. For trying to fix a paper jam in tray three of the office copy machine, that oufit is less than ideal.

 

Don’t pout, Jane. You know I’m right.

 

At least you had the good sense to wear boyfriend jeans and a blazer when it looked like you’d have to use your super flailing powers to stop Gray from meeting up with her mystery date.

Jane requested that she be buried with her shoes. I speak for all of us at YKYLF when I say, please bury us with Jane’s shoes too. These two-tone platforms are fabulous.

 

Clearly, Jane dodged a bullet when Kate left her and Ben. It’s only a matter of time before Kate ends up on a special costume jewelry-centric episode of Hoarders.

Giant ring, giant earrings, and multiple strands of necklaces. When did excessive jewelry become costuming shorthand for “free spirit?”

 

I will take that deer-in-the-headlights look as a “yes.”

I actually like the layered necklaces. With a small pair of earrings, that gorgeous dark blue chunky stone would totally work for me.

 

Capping Teri Hatcher is so much fun.

As for this flowy tunic … do you get that she’s a free spirit yet? Do you? Do you? Because she is very much a free spirit, as evidenced by her asymmetrical paisley tunic. She’s such a free spirit, she doesn’t care that this looks like it was purchased at Mrs. Roper’s estate sale.

 

Then again, Dakota doesn’t seem to care either.

Don’t do it, Kate! He’s only marrying you for your extensive costume jewelry collection!

 

On the other end of the accessorizing spectrum is the always-austere Gray. We don’t see the dress under this jacket – how cold is her office? – but what a great fit.

Much like how the purses on this show are outstanding, Gray’s outerwear choices are consistently spot-on. I love the high belt and military-style pockets.

 

Again, excellent overcoat.

I’m even a fan of the Proenza Schouler sheath dress, with its abstract print and autumnal coloring. It’s not a great color palette for Andi Macdowell, but it’d look great on a hanger in my closet.

 

More proof of the awesomeness of Gray’s outerwear: the trim on this coat.

Patent leather? Pleather? Vinyl? I don’t care, but it’s glossy and so very cool.

 

Probably one of the best dresses we’ve ever seen on Gray. Simple, flattering, and not too harsh.

I’m even going to ignore the totally pointless belt in favor of focusing on the puffy, sheer polka dot sleeves. Such an unusually feminine, flirty option for Gray. How perfect for a first date, right? Too bad it was a fake date. If this is what we can see from a more romantice-inclined Gray, let’s hope she gets a boyfriend, STAT. Otherwise, this is the Gray we get …

 

Is it just me, or do her sleeves appear to be made out of Muppet?

 

India starts off the episode without any devious plans, and it shows. She always looks her best when she’s being devious. Otherwise, she just looks so lost.

Or, in thise case, she looks like a slutty farmgirl.

 

By contrast, here’s India busy with some plotting.

A no-joke leather jacket with some frills in the back, dark top, and olive pants – love it. Can India become an Alias-style super spy and start dressing like this all the time? Because I would totally watch that show.

 

Amanda may have been the youngest Cinderella ever, in the history of acting, but right now it looks like she’s trying out for the starring role in a Lifetime movie about a teacher that seduces a younger man.

I mean, really. I know you’re named after a Melrose Place character, but you are working in a school now. At least try not to show your bra band.

 

Rita Shaw decides that her only hope for winning over Ben is to dress as inappropriately as Amanda does.

Did Rita Shaw undergo some head trauma prior to dressing for school that day? I know Ben is super cute, but I can’t imagine anything less than a concussion would make Rita Shaw opt for a sheer top and black bra on a school day. Had she rolled into the bar wearing this, I’d buy it. But to walk, slow-mo, through the halls? Clearly, she has had a stroke.

 

 

 

That’s better.

Say what you will about Rita’s wardrobe – and we’ve said a lot – but I will give her credit for one thing: Rita Shaw is not afraid of color. How gorgeous is that green with her coloring?

 

Awwww, Ben’s wearing green, just like Rita!

Sure, he’s on the arm of Amanda the Tramp, but we all know that he and Rita are totally MTB.

 

I wish Billy made every entrance as if he’s in the opening credits of a late-80s sitcom.

You take the good, you take the bad, you take them both and then you have …

 

Zoe’s wardrobe!

On the one hand, her spikey jacket continues to grow on me. And with a purse like that, you’ll never have to worry about pickpockets. But there’s something to be said for moderation, and that something is: Zoe, start showing some moderation. Much as how Coco Chanel always suggested taking off one accessory before leaving the house, may I suggest you remove one spiked item before leaving?

 

Then again, if this is what we’re going to get in lieu of metal, maybe we can find a happy medium, because this outfit is just awful.

 

Even Lulu agrees with me, and she never agrees with anyone about anything.

 

I’m starting to wonder if maybe Zoe leaves the house in something super cute, then changes in the alley once she’s out of her dads’ eyes. Why? Because this is how she dresses when she’s set to dine with her dads:

Perfect, right? A little edge, but still sweet and sexy. Also, Kate, take note: this is how you do big earrings.

 

Zoe’s color-coordinated dads agree.

How cute are they, by the way? I hope they’re always this coordinated. How awesome would it be if they went speed-walking in matching track suits, like an old couple in Florida?

 

Also, Christian Siriano appeared for five seconds in the episode.

He was using his elfin body to block Gray from seeing the front page with her ex on it, because apparently Gray doesn’t obsessively check gossip sites first thing in the morning like the rest of us.