Emily performed the full-on RED SHARPIE OF DOOM treatment on the creepy journalist who betrayed her and her father. We also got lots of quality Emily/Nolan time, Fake!Amanda’s take on Coyote Ugly, a shocking paternity revelation and did I mention EMILY BURNED DOWN A HOUSE? You do not cross this girl. Seriously.

Emily’s Target
Bowtie-wearing biographer Mason Treadwell, who screwed over L’il Emily back in her flashback days. You mess with Emily Thorne? SHE BURNS DOWN YOUR HOUSE. And crosses out your face with a Red Sharpie because SHE WILL DESTROY YOU. FYI.

Gala of the Week
Mason Treadwell’s memoir reading @ Queen V’s.

Best Dressed 
Charlotte Grayson continues to have the world’s most dull plotlines and the show’s most amazing outfits. Her retro-inspired floral sundress was adorbs.

Most Soapy Moment
Emily’s father confesses (via an old videotape) that he’s TOTALLY CHARLOTTE’S FATHER!!!! And with that, Charlotte’s plotlines become 100,000% more interesting!

Evil Over-The-Shoulder Hugs: 0 (I think… did we miss any? Let us know in the comments!)


Tune in Saturday for Kate‘s take on this week’s Red Sharpie/bow-tie/soapy shenanigans!