It’s Decade Dance time! The Salvatore brothers sign over the family house to Elena to keep her safe. She gets cabin fever real fast and heads out to school despite an evil supposedly unkillable vampire being after her. Alaric isn’t actually Alaric, he’s Klaus. Sort of. It’s a witchy thing. And he’s kidnapped Katherine and has her stabbing herself repeatedly in the leg.  Meanwhile, in a bit of a misguided scooby gang scene, the good guys give away all their secrets to Klaus because they think he’s Alaric (oops!). At the 1960s Decade Dance, Alaric/Klaus plays them all like a fiddle…that is, except for Bonnie and Damon. Those two may hate each other, but they came up with a pretty good plan to kill (not really!) Bonnie and fool Alaric/Klaus. And Elena, trouble magnet that she is, decides to pay a visit to the dead (not really!) vampire they keep in the basement.


Oh Alaric/Klaus! You kind of wrote this post for me. As he sifts through Alaric’s closet, he ponders, “who is this guy? Safari Sam?”

 

I always thought Alaric was more woodsy Maine than safari, but clearly Klaus is on the same page as the YKYLF staff. His question to Katherine about what to wear is “bad? or badder?”

 

Based on Katherine’s advice, he went for bad, since Alaric looks better in dark colours.

 

If Alaric survives this whole ordeal, I hope for his sake he forgets that he was possessed by an evil Original vampire. But I also hope that if he remembers anything, he remembers that he does look better in dark colours and that maybe his wardrobe sucks. If Buffy taught us anything, it’s that vampire slayers don’t need to dress like they’re on safari.

Meanwhile, Katherine is once again stuck in the same dress for an extended period of time.

 

Oh Katherine, honey, I know. You feel disgusting and you’d kill a man to get your hands on a curling iron.

While Klaus is over criticizing Alaric’s wardrobe and torturing Katherine (all before his morning coffee), a lawyer is signing over the Salvatore family home to Elena, who is just kicking back in a basic grey t-shirt, leggings and what appear to be some pretty cool boots.

Boots that kind of make her legs look like toothpicks. It’s like she borrowed boots from Damon.

I’m impressed with the lawyer though. He knows his place and not once did he look suspicious that the homeowners were waiting outside while a minor signed the deed to their home.

 

While I do enjoy the leather jackets, I wonder why they don’t expand their horizons just a little bit.

Elena’s had to grow up pretty fast for teenager, what with three dead parents, an invasion of vampires and werewolves, and being a doppleganger that can make or break the curse for all vampires.  I don’t know if that’s growing up or post-traumatic stress. Whatever, like any minor who gets her own house she totally invites her best friend over for the signing. 

 

Bonnie’s style baffles me. She wears those flowy empire waisted tops to show us how connected she is to the Earth, but then puts them with cute jackets that seem to have some serious detailing.

 

Elena clearly thinks a safe house is neato idea and figures she’ll sleep at night (although – what about the rest of her family? And has anyone told her legal guardian she’s moved in with her boyfriend and his sexier older brother?), but she also figures she needs to get to school. Heaven forbid she should stay in and get cabin fever. I don’t know about you, but I’d take a marathon game of euchre with Damon over school any day (euchre may or may not be a euphemism. I’ll let you decide).

 

Bonnie, who has a different jacket every week, seems to question her friend’s need to constantly wear the leather jacket. But if you live in the Salvatore house, you must wear leather.  At least Bonnie’s been a good influence on one Gilbert.

 

Ah Jeremy, still looking like a teenager, just a slightly more stylish one. Good work, Bonnie!

Now, here’s the thing I don’t get. I know he looks like Alaric, but…

 

…you’d think they’d notice his erratic behaviour. Like, forgetting what he’s been teaching all week and what actually happened in the ’60s.  At the very least, they should have taken him aside after class to ask if he was doing some day drinking by spiking the coffee with Baileys.  I guess Elena has more important things on her mind.

 

Decade Dance! I bet you thought I was going to say, “evil Original vampire who wants to kill her because she’s some kind of mystical doppleganger”, but no, it’s a dance. I mean, who can think about evil vampires when you’ve got a chance to dress up?

Elsewhere at school, Caroline is also sporting a leather jacket.

 

I love her jacket, but what is it about this town and leather? It’s like they’re being outfitted by that Project Runway contestant who would only use leather for every challenge.

And while I usually love Caroline, I want to smack her for not noticing her boyfriend is turning out to be a giant vampire hating jerk.

I think he’s wearing leather as well. Maybe suede. Some kind of cowhide. Regardless, Matt, you are not a cowboy. Ditch the hide, ditch the plaid and find something that fits.

And Caroline’s vampire hating mom? Well, I don’t know whether to feel bad for her or to applaud the costume department for keeping it real and not making the Sheriff’s uniform more flattering.

 

Because those are some seriously high waisted, mom pants. My guess is they’re made of a horrible fabric. She must be dying in them.

I will give props to the costume department for sometimes getting it right, like with Sheriff pants or teenagers. Because this week’s extra, Dana, was totally dressed like most teens I see.

 

Poor Dana. Any extra that gets a name is bound to meet a horrible death within the week.  But even though she was the bearer of bad news and warned Elena that evil Klaus will be at the dance, Elena’s mind was still on one thing.

Yay! Decade Dance! How can you not want to go to a dance when your boyfriend’s family has kept everything, neatly labelled by era, from the past 100 years. What kind of storage place does that house have? Because it really should look like an episode of Hoarders if they’ve kept that much stuff.

And the Decade Dance brings up the really important questions in Elena’s life. Like, how much do I actually want to live? And how much do I value my family and friends’ lives? And more importantly: sexy hippie or Twiggy?

I vote Twiggy, but Elena never listens to anyone.

Over at Alaric’s, Klaus’ witchy friend is helping him get ready with what I like to call a “pre-game drink”.

I question this witch’s choice in tops, but he looks to be built like a brick shithouse (or a hockey player), and it’s not easy to dress that frame.

Alaric/Klaus was in search of something vintage, but no go. Just a monochromatic drawer full of sweaters from the Gap and Banana Republic.

 

But Alaric’s drawers are more than what they seem (not a euphemism!).

 

I guess this is why Jenna never got a drawer at Alaric’s place.