This week’s episode was one of revelations, confessions, and discovery. Lily’s fantastic parenting skills and expertise as a hostess finally came to the forefront, as did her deception in sending Ben to jail and betrayal of selling Bass Industries.

In a series of flashbacks, we finally get the entire story of Serena’s supposed boarding school transgressions with Ben…I mean, Mr. Donovan. Intercut with said flashbacks, we have Dan, Blair, and Rufus’ vintage Morris Minor Convertible (Two For the Road, anyone?) as they search into Juliet’s past. Joining the unlikely pair is Damien, who leads the trio to Mrs. Sharp, Juliet’s normal, townie mother.

Juliet herself arrives home, is greeted by the mailman, later spots the UESiders, and books it back to NY just in time to threaten S. The Archibalds’ family drama finally comes to a head as Anne admits she and the Captain could never work.

The half-season finale ends with Chuck off to possibly recruit his enemy – Jack Bass, Serena seeing Ben after all these years, and Blair and Dan…washing dishes and sharing a moment.

 

We didn’t see much of Chuck this episode – but as per usual, he was looking dapper in a suit and tie. Suit, pink-and-navy shirt-tie combination, gold Rolex, and a glass of scotch. Classic Chuck Bass, not much more to say.
Except this line: “My face actually hurts from smiling so much.”

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I’m still wondering why Chuck Bass, who owns a bowtie and coordinating pocket square in every color of the rainbow, would choose grey and pink for a holiday party. We’ve seen Chuck in so many suits they’re beginning to blend together. As much as I love suited and booted Chuck, I miss the whimsy of his season one and two outfits.

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Yeah, I’m confused too, Chuck. Why is there a picture of Lily (whom I mistakenly thought was Juliet during my livetweet – Lily’s doctor is good) with the same dress, updo, and earrings behind you? Why the paisley bowtie and grey suit with subtle pink running throughout?

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This, Juliet, is how you travel. With a woollen grey sweater that bears no resemblance to Rufus’ and leather overnighters. We’ll pretend to forget where you’re going, and more importantly why you’re going, because your pocket square is shaped like a rose, and lavender looks good on you.

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Quelle horreur! The Queen B and Lonely Boy? These two make an unlikely alliance – and an unholy coupling. Blair will always remain best-dressed of the two. Donning a checkered coat and Eugenia Kim beret, B is well equipped to, as GG puts it, “find that bitch”. The lace tights and Giuseppe Zanotti two-tone pumps are, of course, parfait, as usual.
Still not sure what’s going on with her bag. It’s a bit of a mess, really.

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I was on the fence about this outfit, but ultimately, decided that I love the silk top with lace insets and tweed skirt. The lace insets on the sleeves do match her lace tights – which was what made me love it.

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Gorgeous makeup, albeit flat hair, but I wanted to draw attention to Blair’s bow necklace. N’est-il pas adorable? If you found her lack of headbands this episode alarming, B makes up for it with this necklace.

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Perhaps one of the most hilarious moments of this episode, we have Blair explaining to Dan that one must wash Riedel glasses with L’Occitane shampoo (and props to Dan for pronouncing L’Occitane correctly – he’s assimilating to the UES nicely). We’ll forgive the giant cluster of pearls that serves as a necklace, because of the three ostenatiously large necklaces of the episode, this is the best. The red-and-black tweed dress is festive, shows off Blair’s oh-so tiny waist, and also matches…

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Yeah, we didn’t expect it either. Dan and Blair matching? Say it ain’t so!

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Poorly-constructed grey coat, jeans, brown loafers…*yawn*. Next, please.

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Underneath the grey trench Dan wears a navy blue henley. Only thing I can say is, *yawn* and Dan, please button the top of your shirt. Your chest hair is milimeters away from demanding its own trailer and a mention in the credits.

Also, I’d like to draw attention to Blair’s childhood dolls collection – she’s got her very own cabbage patch doll (has her doll met Cedric, Dan’s own cabbage patch?), right alongside limited edition barbies and a Carebear.

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I was hoping for Dan to forgo his plaid for the holidays. ‘Twas not to be, mes amies. (He and Blair do match rather nicely, however.)

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Following Blair’s look of disgust upon entering 252 Cornice Ave…an old foe (ally?) pops up.

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Damien! Looking devilishly handsome as always. His clothes, however, are a bore.
Black.

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And more black. (although he complements Dan and Blair’s outfits rather nicely. They make an odd trio, albeit a matching one.)

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Boarding school Damien, however, is adorable. His asking Serena if a B- would be okay (S: “I want an A+.”) and look of amazement after the Serena van der Woodsen kissed him endeared him to all of us. We almost forgot he was a drug dealer. The buttoned grey school cardigan and perfectly knotted tie scream adorable nerd. Well that, and the pencil in his hand while the rest of the group watches Serena down absinthe. I’m curious to know exactly how he got into his profession…

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Blair and Dan’s conversation to Conneticut was hilarious (Blair: “Is the pedal to the metal? Because I swear if I shove my feet through the floor I could run faster.”), but this picture warrants a laugh. Note Damien’s headphones – is he trying to drown out Blair and Dan?

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Ben did quite a one-eighty this episode. From the scheming prisoner with a grudge against Serena, he develops a moral compass and actually warns Nate that Juliet is going after Serena. It appears this moral compass was in play even back in his and Serena’s boarding school days. As Serena says, “he was the only guy to ever say no to [her]”.

The leather shoulder bag, tweed coat, plaid shirt, and comb-over all scream pretentious boarding school teacher. I could see him in some twelve-dollar-a-cup niche coffee shop, grading papers on a Saturday afternoon.

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The best shot I could get of Ben’s second outfit – navy blazer and brown pants. Hardly noteworthy, but his and Serena’s ‘study session’ was très adorable.

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Dressed in a woollen brown top, jeans, and (are they moccasins?) questionable shoes, Mrs. Sharp is quite a departure from the cocktail-dress-at-noon-wearing mothers of the Upper East Side. However, it encompasses Juliet’s non-UESider status perfectly, and her mother looks every bit the suburban – I mean townie – mom who bakes cookies and pins their children’s paintings onto the walls.
Note the well-worn, scratched up couch, complete with masking tape. Kudos to the GG prop department for realism.

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Ignoring the battered blue suitcase and the fact that she’s dressed in pretty much one color again, Juliet’s outfit is lovely. The studded grey satchel and grey Manolos lend themselves nicely to the cropped black shearling, and the sweater dress looks gorgeous on her. However, the real star in Juliet’s look is…

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Her hair and makeup. She may have had to learn to do her own hair, but damn is she good (perhaps Orlando Pita is hiring?). Juliet’s makeup is understated and gorgeous as well – it’s a shame Jenny didn’t stick around long enough to learn a lesson or two (about hair and makeup, not scheming) from Juliet.

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The tousled locks, red, tear-filled eyes, and plaintive, “We’re nobodies” had us actually feeling sorry for Juliet. Her loose, studded black sweater looks both comfy and chic.

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A shot of the grey and black sweater dress, because it looks cozy, tasteful, and looks great on Juliet.

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And one last shot – Breakfast (okay, lunch) at the Basses, anyone? This is the non-judgjing breakfast club (sans Chuck who is busy getting his luggage together) plus Dan. Plus, the tableware is gorgeous.

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