Anne Archibald’s outfit here is pretty generic Upper East Side Rich Wife, but I had to include it.  You’ll see why.

Maybe she should lay off the Prozac.  And put down the trowel she used to cake her makeup on.

As for the Captain, he hates starchy shirts, of which this is one.  It appears that he, like his son, has a wild affection for the color blue.

The grownups, while not necessarily plastering themselves in feathers and furbelows and fake gems, have a costume party of their own to attend—Eleanor Waldorf’s Middle Eastern-themed shindig.

And what does this Upper East Side power couple wear to such an event?

*Snore*  This is an almost exact replica of the outfit that Anne was wearing that morning, except the ivory blouse has a few pathetically limp ruffles on it.  The Captain’s in, yes, you guessed it, another starched shirt, though he’s getting wildly creative by experimenting with stripes.

Eleanor Waldorf, like her daughter, both knows how to throw a good party and how to dress for one.  That amazing dress you see up above—you know, the one that makes it look like the Archibalds not only didn’t try but that they failed spectacularly?  That’s Eleanor.  Here’s a better picture.

The dress itself could veer into costume-y territory, but it stays firmly on the couture side of the line.  I love the cream color on her, and the black patterned edging on the hem, the bodice and the sleeves is very chic.  If you look closely enough, you’ll notice that Eleanor, like her daughter, loves a good headpiece.  This one is jeweled and intricate.

But when she’s not wearing floor length harem-inspired gowns, Eleanor loses her touch.

This is boring, boring, boring.  At least the brown color is rich though the pattern is too small and I don’t like the pleating on the bodice—which is the only feature that gives it any interest whatsoever.

Chuck’s dad, Bart Bass, makes it clear where his son learned how to wear a suit.

The subtle pin-striping on the suit and the plum tie, paired with a pocket square, move this from business lunch to evening party.  Bart’s date, however, is totally confused why she’s wearing what looks like a gold-plated muumuu.

I think Lily would agree that she looks terrible, because she dazzles in her dress, which like Eleanor, toes the line between stage and soiree effortlessly. Despite all the flamboyant Masquerade Ball costumes this episode, I think this is my favorite look.

Talk about luxe.  Take notes, Kati, this is the way you do jeweled accents.  She’s definitely Serena’s mother, because there’s more than a hint of cleavage showing, but it’s age-appropriate, and she looks fabulous, so it might not even matter if it wasn’t.  Her hair, however, is the real piece de resistance.

The braided bun is flattering and pretty, and her earrings add an exotic touch, but don’t look at all cheap.  They still look expensive.  In fact, Lily looks expensive here, which is probably why Bart and Rufus can’t tear their eyes away from her.

As for Rufus, Lily’s erstwhile date to the party, well . . .

He tried.

The same way you just know that Serena and Lily are mother and daughter, you can tell that Rufus and Dan are father and son.  Rufus slightly improves on his son’s ineptitude with formalwear, though considering how many years he’s had to learn something in this area, I’m not all that impressed.  He should be doing a lot better by now.

Brown’s a good color on him, and the subtle striping in the suit is nice.  I wouldn’t have paired it with a shirt the same color, though, or worn a tie with so much brown in it.  The navy base of the tie is the only thing Rufus is wearing that isn’t brown.  Unlike Blair’s monochromatic success, this is definitely a failure.

Unfortunately, Rufus doesn’t appear to own clothing that isn’t brown.

I think this might be left over from his Lincoln Hawk days, because it looks a lot worse for the wear—even frumpier and more wrinkled than Dan’s limp, biscuit-colored shirt—and it looks like he bought it about ten pounds ago.  It’s too tight across the midsection and accentuates his (beer?) belly, which is odd because he’s not really chubby.  Not the way to go, Rufus, especially if you’re going to be escorting Lily Van der Woodsen around.  Also, I don’t know a father of two who would wear that many bracelets.  Do men even wear bracelets?  They look odd, period, but if he was attached to the idea of them, he should pick one, not the whole handful.